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Audiobooks > Family & Relationships >  Parenting > Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

Download Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers Audiobook

Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers Audiobook, by Gordon Neufeld Extended Sample Click for printable size audiobook cover
Author: Gordon Neufeld, Gabor Mate, M.D. Narrator: Narrator Info Added Soon Publisher: Penguin Random House Format: Unabridged Audiobook Delivery: Instant Download Audio Length: Release Date: July 2018 ISBN: 9780735277410
3.99791979949875 out of 53.99791979949875 out of 53.99791979949875 out of 53.99791979949875 out of 53.99791979949875 out of 5 4.00 (798 ratings) (rate this audio book)
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This parenting classic on one of the most disturbing and misunderstood trends of our time--peers replacing parents in the lives of children--is now more relevant than ever. The latest edition includes new material on how social media and video game culture are affecting our children, and what parents can do.
 
In Hold On to Your Kids, Dr. Neufeld and Dr. Maté explore the phenomenon of peer orientation: the troubling tendency of children and youth to look to their peers for direction--for a sense of right and wrong, for values, identity and codes of behaviour. But peer orientation undermines family cohesion, poisons the school atmosphere, and fosters an aggressively hostile and sexualized youth culture. It provides a powerful explanation for schoolyard bullying and youth violence; it is an escalating trend that has never been adequately described or contested until Hold On to Your Kids. Once understood, it becomes self-evident--as do the solutions. Download and start listening now!

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Quotes & Awards

  • Hold on to Your Kids blows in from Canada like a Blue Northern, bringing us genuinely new ideas and fresh perspectives on parenting. The authors integrate psychology, anthropology, neurology and their own personal and professional experiences as they examine the 'context' of parenting today. This is a worthy book with practical implications for mom and dad. Dr. Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia and The Shelter of Each Other

    "Hold on to Your Kids is visionary book that goes beyond the usual explanations to illuminate a crisis of unrecognized proportions. The authors show us how we are losing contact with our children and how this loss undermines their development and threatens the very fabric of sociey. Most importantly they offer, through concrete examples and clear suggestions, practical help for parents to fulfill their instinctual roles. A brilliant and well written book, one to be taken seriously, very seriously.
  • The thoughts and perspectives presented by the authors are informative — even inspirational — for those who choose to dedicate their lives and energy to students. Bulletin of the National Association of Secondary School Principals
  • With original insights on parent-child attachments and how parents can restore them, this is a book for revitalizing families and rekindling the song in their children’s hearts. Raffi, children’s troubadour, founder of Child Honoring Society Institute
  • With simple ideas and steps, this book is directed not only to parents, but to all those — educators, social workers, counselors — whose lives and work bring them into contact with children. Quill & Quire
  • Though this is Neufeld's personal theory, Maté (Scattered Minds, When the Body Says No) has expressed his colleague's ideas in precise and hard-hitting prose that makes complex ideas accessible without dumbing them down. The result is a book that grabs hard, with the potential to hit many parents where they live. The Edmonton Journal
  • [M]ay serve as a loud wake-up call for mothers and fathers….this one offers what many of the others do not — that rare commodity known as common sense. Winnipeg Free Press

    "With the benefit of 30 years of research and experience, Neufeld has crafted a coherent, compelling theory of child development that will cause an immediate frisson of recognition and acceptance in its readers. His approach has the power to change, if not save, the lives of our children.
  • The authors present doable strategies to help parents help their kids. If their advice is taken to heart, there’s hope there will be more warmth and security all round. The Georgia Straight
  • An utterly sensible and deeply moving book written for a general audience. The Vancouver Sun

Listener Reviews

Write a Review
  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Amanda | 9/24/2019

    " Hold On To Your Kids really put in to perspective what attachment is like for kids as they get older and the importance of the child adult attachment in a child's life. It confirms the positive things I institutionally knew with research. It is an important book for any parent to read. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Jo | 2/20/2014

    " Ok so this is not the best written book ever but the ideas in it are essential for any parent wanting to raise their kids in the most conscious way. It explains the whys and how's of all of those niggly gut feelings over the years that told me something was amiss in society in supporting me to parent my son. As Nuefeld says, just because something is normal it doesn't make I natural or right. I am going to buy copies of this book for every friend I know. Please read this book. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Celestia | 2/19/2014

    " This is what I call the Attachment Parenting book for older kids. A must read if you want to stay close to your kids as they get older. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Johanna | 1/16/2014

    " Absolutely fantastic book, a must-read for parents. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Cyndi | 12/18/2013

    " Not an easy read but so relevant. Breeze the first chapters to get to the chapters of substance. Sure to spark some controversy in every parent and may change your view on parenting. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Sara | 12/13/2013

    " One of my very favorite books for why we parent and educate the way we do. Not full of practical advice, but it does help me keep my eyes on the prize! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Mhnd | 11/29/2013

    " As much as I love everything Gabor Mate, I'm finding this book hard to relate to given I don't have kids of my own. I'm still going to finish it as it provides great insight into human developmental psychology, which is what I'm interested in. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Munira | 11/21/2013

    " This book had a lot of good points in helping parents re-frame their relationship with their kids. However, I did not feel the book was balanced in its approach of how parents can treat peer relationships respective to the family. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Teeni | 11/21/2013

    " Fantastic, especially the last 4 chapters. I probably liked it because it reinforced a lot of beliefs I have about raising my children, but from a different perspective. Highly recommend for all parents. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 reed | 11/1/2013

    " I picked this up because I heard about the author's concept of counterwill - that innate human tendency to resist when someone tries to control you. But I was turned off by his "kids these days" rhetoric. Didn't make it past the first chapter. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Sarah | 10/21/2013

    " I'm giving this book to all my friends parenting kids with me. It is an attachment perspective on western adolescence, and resonates with my feelings about parenting. It is yet another parenting book written by a man who I suspect spends more time being a parenting expert than being with his kids. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Eliana | 8/11/2013

    " I really dislike this book. I think the problem is that they are super dramatic about how friends are evil for kids...and the writing is bad. So I quit! "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Savannacles | 8/10/2013

    " Wish I'd read it before having kids. Beautiful, clear, and such solid ideas. This is one that every parent should have a copy of. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Michãel | 7/8/2013

    " Based on attachment theory. I love that this is a parenting "expert" who wishes parents trusted their intuition more and relied less on "experts". "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Amy | 5/4/2013

    " With so many books on attachment parenting focusing on the early years, I was thrilled to find one that talked about school aged children. Though I thought his views on ADHD and ODD a bit simplistic, this is still a book that will enrich my parenting. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Tina | 9/26/2012

    " Although I enjoyed this book, it doesn't hold much for the homeschooling family. Most of the topics covered were those that we painstakingly struggled with when deciding to home school. "

About the Author

Gabor Maté, MD, is  the bestselling author of When the Body Says No and Scattered Minds. Dr. Maté is highly sought after for his expertise on a range of topics, from addiction and attention deficit disorder (ADD) to mind-body wellness, adolescent mental health, and parenting. His byline is often seen in the Globe and Mail, for articles and commentary ranging from health to politics. He has worked in family practice, palliative care and psychotherapy. He is presently staff physician at a clinic in Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside, where his patients are people with drug addictions, HIV, and related problems.