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Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office Audiobook, by Jen Lancaster Play Audiobook Sample

Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office Audiobook

Bitter is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office Audiobook, by Jen Lancaster Play Audiobook Sample
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Read By: Jamie Heinlein Publisher: Penguin Audio Listen Time: at 1.0x Speed 6.83 hours at 1.5x Speed 5.13 hours at 2.0x Speed Release Date: May 2009 Format: Unabridged Audiobook ISBN: 9781440641077

Quick Stats About this Audiobook

Total Audiobook Chapters:

113

Longest Chapter Length:

08:09 minutes

Shortest Chapter Length:

02:02 minutes

Average Chapter Length:

05:28 minutes

Audiobooks by this Author:

19

Other Audiobooks Written by Jen Lancaster: > View All...

Publisher Description

Unabridged ? 11 hours This is the smart-mouthed, soul- searching story of a woman trying to figure out what happens next when she's gone from six figures to unemployment checks and she stops to reconsider some of the less-than-rosy attitudes and values she thought she'd never have to answer for when times were good.

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"I really enjoyed this book. I def laughed out loud more than a few times reading this book. I know what it is like to have to survive on barely nothing in order to get by. I could relate to when she and her husband both got laid because when my husband got laid off we had only one income to get by on and it was depressing dealing with bill collectors who think you should give up eating in order to pay them. Alot of things she talks about dealing with really hit home for me."

— Jill (5 out of 5 stars)

Bitter is the New Black Listener Reviews

Overall Performance: 4.052631578947368 out of 54.052631578947368 out of 54.052631578947368 out of 54.052631578947368 out of 54.052631578947368 out of 5 (4.05)
5 Stars: 15
4 Stars: 11
3 Stars: 11
2 Stars: 1
1 Stars: 0
Narration: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 (0.00)
5 Stars: 0
4 Stars: 0
3 Stars: 0
2 Stars: 0
1 Stars: 0
Story: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 (0.00)
5 Stars: 0
4 Stars: 0
3 Stars: 0
2 Stars: 0
1 Stars: 0
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  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Laughed my fool head off! I read all of her books now and have liked them all. "

    — Lauren, 2/19/2014
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Jen Lancaster is downright hilarious. Her take on life, friends, polo shirts...is just too funny! She says things that we all think, but are to chicken to say out loud! I love all her books! "

    — Kathleen, 2/9/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " As a dot com victims I could relate to what she set through. All of the anxiety and fear, while trying to keep a hold onto your persona (as unpleasant as it may be!) "

    — Jami, 2/1/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Favorite line so far. "But what about my minions?" "

    — Contessa, 1/31/2014
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " A little too bitter for me. Not as funny as some of her others. "

    — April, 1/30/2014
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Reading this for Book Club and liking it! It's apparently a memoir, and I love that the author recognized and poked fun at her outrageous attitude toward herself, others, and situation in life. "

    — Stefanie, 1/17/2014
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Enjoyable read with a surprisingly redemptive ending. "

    — Elizabeth, 1/15/2014
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " One of my favorites, hysterical. "

    — Desirae, 12/22/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " HILARIOUS! The footnotes are great addition to the story. Good for light reading. I believe there might be some progression with her books but I've only read this one. "

    — Stacey, 12/7/2013
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Interesting (and frightening) look at one woman's life post-layoff. Can't imagine this experience hasn't been shared by many. "

    — Kate, 12/5/2013
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This was a really easy and quick read. Very funny! "

    — Bridget, 12/2/2013
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I loved this book. Randomly stumbled upon it and thought it was hilarious. The best of her books. "

    — Dana, 12/2/2013
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This put a fun spin on the pitfalls happening to so many in today's economy. Helps to show how to keep things in perspective and keep a sense of humor on life. "

    — Mum34, 11/8/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Jensational! She can be insensitive, but she IS hilarious. I also love how she stands by her man. "

    — Sharon, 6/3/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " i laughed SO HARD. it was awesome!!! "

    — Soleil, 4/24/2013
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Good snarky fun. "

    — Lori, 3/9/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I love her bitchy sarcasm and brutal honesty (I can definitely relate to that). Her writing is hysterical to the point that I'm laughing out loud while reading in public. "

    — Lauren, 1/23/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I feel like I have found a soul-sister. Jen and her insane selfishness are a riot, watching her get knocked down a peg at a time and finally learn some hard lessons is even funnier. "

    — Teri, 9/27/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Although I vastly prefer fiction, this book was a fast, easy, entertaining read. I laughed out loud several times. "

    — E, 9/20/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Very Sophie Kinsella-esque... except that it's all actually true... or a version of the truth. Quick summer read. Not for anyone that wants a very in depth, emotionally moving read. It's fun and funny. "

    — Annie, 5/3/2012
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I find Jen to be hysterical. She is obnoxious, but she owns that. I find myself often laughing out loud at her self-deprecating humor. "

    — Jen, 3/30/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " We read this for book club years ago...I remember thinking it was funny, but couldn't get past the materialism of all the shoes and purses. Saw the book she wrote about being fat and am intrigued, but not sure that I like her writing style? "

    — Erika, 12/13/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Love anything Jen Lancaster books - totally refreshing! "

    — Julie, 11/5/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Hysterically funny!!! "

    — Helen, 10/9/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I thought it was hilarious and would recommend this book to anyone that doesn't mind a little ego in their author along with their humorous ways of telling a story. "

    — Easter, 7/1/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " one of the few "chick lit" type books that I loved. very witty and self aware "

    — Amanda, 5/24/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Normally, I don't like this type of book -- snarky, in your face, OMG I can't believe so &amp; so, etc. However, I rather enjoyed it. <br/> <br/>[spoilers removed] "

    — Bianca, 5/23/2011
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I guess this is not chick lit, more like self-absorbed lit. It was fairly entertaining, had some funny parts, and made me grateful for my Prada-less life. "

    — Cynthia, 5/23/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I loved this book! Jen is totally relatable as a twenty-something young professional and I was laughing out loud! "

    — Andrea, 5/20/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Jen Lancaster has a unique style of writing that is both funny and sarcastic (often bold and pissy, which I like). This was the first book I read of hers and I am now continuing on with her other books. "

    — Jen, 5/20/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " She is hillarious, I'll read anything she writes! "

    — Amy, 5/15/2011
  • Overall Performance: 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " The author is very witty so i was enjoying the book initially. But then i realized there was really no story happening and i was over just reading the author's thoughts about life. Fun title though. "

    — Heather, 5/12/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This is a memoir. I normally don't like memoirs, but this one is hysterical. The whole Prada Bag at the unemployment office spoke to me. Been there; done that; felt that. An absolute must-read. Her writing style is envious. "

    — Katherine, 5/12/2011
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " A book about the author's life. The dialogue is witty and the combacks snappy but the book all in all fell short for me. I think maybe because the character was so horrible in the beginning but it was a nice evening read. Maybe I will like her other books better. "

    — Melissa, 5/10/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Again, if you need a lighthearted, laugh out loud book, read these! "

    — Tracyd, 5/4/2011
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I just love Jen Lancaster! She is hilarious and her sense of humor is 100% me! "

    — Vicki, 4/27/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Just starting this one and so far it is great. Ease to read and funny stuff. I think any woman can see just a little bit of herself in Jen's story. <br/> <br/>OK, so now I finished it and more than once I was literally LOL over some of the stuff she did. I love how relatable she is! "

    — Callie, 4/26/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Total chick book, but I like the way her character develops during the book. It was entertaining. Found it free on the street. "

    — Michelle, 4/24/2011

About Jen Lancaster

Jen Lancaster is the New York Times bestselling author of several novels, nonfiction works, and memoirs, including I Regret Nothing, which was named an Amazon Best Book of the Year. She has sold well over a million books documenting her attempts to shape up, grow up, and have it all—sometimes with disastrous results. She has also been seen on The Today Show, as well as CBS This Morning, Fox News, NPR’s All Things Considered, and The Joy Behar Show, among others. Visit her website at www.jenlancaster.com.

About Jamie Heinlein

Jamie Heinlein is a frequent stage actress whose roles include Natalie in The Weight of Water, Doris in Victor, the title character in Penny Penniworth, Susan in The Secretaries, and many others. She has also narrated various audio books including Hidden America by Jeanne Marie Laskas and Jennifer Lancaster’s series of memoirs from Bitter is the New Black to If I were Here. In her spare time, Jamie sells residential real estate in New York City for Douglas Elliman.