A landmark cultural event that changes the way all of us view divorce.
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"This book blew me away. It was riveting and taught me a lot. Dr. Wallerstein does not really profess her opinion on divorce, she reports her findings of studying over 200 people from divorced families over 25 years. She clearly supports marriage but there is a good reason. She sees what divorce does to people. I learned a lot about myself and that many other people from divorced families are just like me. Unmarried into their 30s and 40s, struggling with the concepts of relationships in general, high anxiety about life, and so on. She also studies intact families that had very bad problems but stayed together and what that does to people. It is all very interesting. From the perspective of men and women. But no gay or queer people. I wish she would talk about that a bit. I am sure there were some gay people in the study. The book could have spoken to me a lot more if that were the case. She is based in Berkeley, CA. A pretty liberal place with many gay families."
— Kate (4 out of 5 stars)
" Enlightening! I would highly recommend this book to anyone who's parents divorced or is married to someone whose parents divorced. "
— Heather, 2/8/2014" This is so scary becuase I see so much of it in myself and my brothers. "
— Heather, 1/30/2014" The interviews read as laughingly contrived, but still a good choice for someone interested in the subject. Though it does seem sad that Wallerstein had to conduct a 25-year study and write a book to tell us what should be common sense: that the effects of divorce on children are life-long and that, with the exception of a small minority of cases, children are always worse off. "
— Alisha, 1/27/2014" This is a unique book in that it is a longitudinal study of children of divorce. While it is exhaustive, the author does a good job of condensing what must have been a lot of notes from numerous interviews. Careful editing made it very readable. I recommend it to her target audience, (children of divorce), and parents who are considering divorce. Those adults whose childhoods were marked by divorce will find a therapist who is sympathetic to their experiences and supportive of hopeful outcomes. Her conclusion: Suffering for families who go through divorce is inevitable, but there are ways to make the transition more humane. She also has very good recommendations for the courts, the mediators, and the professionals who work with families. I recommend that it be read in conjunction with Contemplating Divorce: the step by step guide on deciding whether to stay or go. Also, For Better or For Worse, revisiting divorce; and Helping Children cope with Divorce. "
— Rochelle, 1/24/2014" Not good literature, you understand, but one of the only empirical works on the effects of divorce, especially on children. The evidence reveals things quite contrary to many popular beliefs. It was painful stuff to read, but necessary. "
— O., 1/20/2014" strong evidence that divorce screws up kids of all ages "
— Larry, 12/26/2013" only 3 b/c really, who wants to read a depressing book? But, it's informative, true to life, and eye-opening to the societal drift regarding the importance of the meaning of marriage. "
— Veronica, 12/20/2013" Very insightful for those of us who have gone through this. "
— Billy, 12/12/2013" This is a good book for adult children whose parents have divorced. It sort of gives hope for the next generation while explaining that divorce may just be inevitable for some. "
— Jessica, 5/29/2013" As a child of divorce, I was curious to read this book based on a 25-year study of the effects of divorce on children and families. I enjoy reading books like this and really enjoyed the topic that I could completely relate to. "
— Renee, 4/1/2013" Ugh. Important, eye-opening read, but hard to get through it all. Some of the stories are pretty disturbing. "
— Rob, 12/1/2012" I didn't realize until reading this book why I feel the way I feel about certain things. This book is very helpful. "
— Camille, 10/24/2012" A pioneering 25 year study on divorce. A must read for anyone close to this horrific choice when children are involved. "
— Clayton, 2/13/2012" This book is a revelation--helping me better understand & forgive my parents & myself. "
— Samara, 11/13/2011" Really interesting. A 25 year study of children of divorce, with some suprising results. It's good for every parent to read, I learned from it, and my kids are grown. Very compassionate. "
— Julie, 11/15/2010" Enlightening! I would highly recommend this book to anyone who's parents divorced or is married to someone whose parents divorced. "
— Heather, 11/9/2010" Ugh. Important, eye-opening read, but hard to get through it all. Some of the stories are pretty disturbing. "
— Rob, 7/10/2010" Excellent analysis of the impact of divorce on children. "
— Alysa, 6/16/2010" Not good literature, you understand, but one of the only empirical works on the effects of divorce, especially on children. The evidence reveals things quite contrary to many popular beliefs. It was painful stuff to read, but necessary. "
— O., 1/13/2010" <br/>Every therapist must read this book. <br/> <br/>A 25 year study; Wallerstein follows young children for 25 years and updates every 5-7 years. It is fascinating to read actual accounts of the effects of divorce or 'dysfunctional' familial histories. <br/> <br/> <br/>Read this! "
— Randi, 11/30/2009" only 3 b/c really, who wants to read a depressing book? But, it's informative, true to life, and eye-opening to the societal drift regarding the importance of the meaning of marriage. "
— Veronica, 10/11/2009" Offers insights into unanticipated effects of divorce on children and their relationships, illuminated by a 25-year longitudinal study. "
— Dawn, 8/14/2009" Every sociocultural book I read mentions this important book, so I read it. "
— Renee, 8/12/2009" For children of divorce, divorced/ing parents, step-parents, teachers, counselors, partners of children of divorce.... basically mandatory reading. many a-ha moments. a truly important book. "
— Kat, 6/17/2009" Many insightful and credible case studies. Gives tremendous information for those who know of, have a relationship with, or are afffected by divorce. "
— Jan, 2/17/2009" This is a good book for adult children whose parents have divorced. It sort of gives hope for the next generation while explaining that divorce may just be inevitable for some. "
— Jessica, 9/13/2008Sandra Blakeslee is a science correspondent at the New York Times who specializes in the brain sciences. She has witnessed firsthand the major developments and discoveries in neuroscience, both in the United States and abroad, for well over twenty years. She has cowritten many books, including the bestselling Second Chances with Judith Wallerstein. She is the third generation in a family of science writers.
Kate McIntyre has had a thirty-five-year love affair with acting, theater, singing and voiceovers. Her credits include over 250 plays and musicals (her favorite role is that of Miss Adelaide in Guys and Dolls), twenty-six independent films, and various television appearances and commercials. She is also an avid reader and truly enjoys bringing her beloved books to life for others.