“My daughter used to be so wonderful. Now I can barely stand her and she won’t tell me anything. How can I find out what’s going on?” “There’s a clique in my daughter’s grade that’s making her life miserable. She doesn’t want to go to school anymore. Her own supposed friends are turning on her, and she’s too afraid to do anything. What can I do?” Welcome to the wonderful world of your daughter’s adolescence. A world in which she comes to school one day to find that her friends have suddenly decided that she no longer belongs. Or she’s teased mercilessly for wearing the wrong outfit or having the wrong friend. Or branded with a reputation she can’t shake. Or pressured into conforming so she won’t be kicked out of the group. For better or worse, your daughter’s friendships are the key to enduring adolescence—as well as the biggest threat to her well-being. In her groundbreaking book, Queen Bees and Wannabes, Empower cofounder Rosalind Wiseman takes you inside the secret world of girls’ friendships. Wiseman has spent more than a decade listening to thousands of girls talk about the powerful role cliques play in shaping what they wear and say, how they respond to boys, and how they feel about themselves. In this candid, insightful book, she dissects each role in the clique: Queen Bees, Wannabes, Messengers, Bankers, Targets, Torn Bystanders, and more. She discusses girls’ power plays, from birthday invitations to cafeteria seating arrangements and illicit parties. She takes readers into “Girl World” to analyze teasing, gossip, and reputations; beauty and fashion; alcohol and drugs; boys and sex; and more, and how cliques play a role in every situation. Each chapter includes “Check Your Baggage” sections to help you identify how your own background and biases affect how you see your daughter. “What You Can Do to Help” sections offer extensive sample scripts, bulleted lists, and other easy-to-use advice to get you inside your daughter’s world and help you help her. It’s not just about helping your daughter make it alive out of junior high. This book will help you understand how your daughter’s relationship with friends and cliques sets the stage for other intimate relationships as she grows and guides her when she has tougher choices to make about intimacy, drinking and drugs, and other hazards. With its revealing look into the secret world of teenage girls and cliques, enlivened with the voices of dozens of girls and a much-needed sense of humor, Queen Bees and Wannabes will equip you with all the tools you need to build the right foundation to help your daughter make smarter choices and empower her during this baffling, tumultuous time of life.
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"Rosalind Wiseman really hits home with this one! The description of the roles that girls play are amazingly accurate! I have found this book to be extremely beneficial in understanding the dynamics that my daughter is exposed to everyday. Every mother of a daughter should have this on their shelf!"
— Chandler (5 out of 5 stars)
" A definite must-read for parents of pre-teen and teenage girls. You may not agree with it all, but it gives you a basis to begin to understand their world! "
— Kim, 2/18/2014" I think the author over analyzes some of the types of girls here, I also don't see my daughter as old enough yet that these things are happening in her life yet. "
— Theresa, 2/17/2014" A must read for any parent of girls, or anyone who comes in contact with girls. "
— Kam, 2/17/2014" This is a great how-to books for raising teenage females. It is geared towards parents and offers little for the people in the young women's lives who are not parents. "
— Alexandra, 2/9/2014" One of the best books I have read on parenting in general. As a dad of three girls I found her insights more helpful than I can say. "
— Matthew, 2/5/2014" I took lots of notes from this book. Great advice for dealing with all the girl drama that is going on in elementary schools. I learned alot from this book and recommend it to anyone with daughters, and teachers! "
— Tenille, 2/2/2014" I don't agree with all of her philosophies, but the author gets girls. It was almost painful to remember the angst. Great view into teen girl world. "
— Heidi, 1/18/2014" Extremely helpful for anyone with daughters. Practical, knowledgeable. "
— Juliette, 1/16/2014" If you have daughters, this is a MUST read --- very insightful as they enter adolescence! "
— Diane, 12/1/2013" A must read for anyone who has daughters or works with teen girls. "
— Kate, 12/1/2013" Fascinating and insightful read. I certainly disagree with some of her ideas, perceptions and advice, but some of it is useful in helping to understand what our teens and tweens are going through. "
— Angela, 11/15/2013" This book should be read by all mothers of young girls. The content can be surprising, startling and even shocking. Advice is given in a no nonsense manner, with a good dose of empathy. "
— Sue, 7/31/2013" Great update! SEAL technique is helpful, being a hard-a&& parent is reasonable; tips are given for helping your daughter manage adolescence in a digital age. "
— Tanya, 4/8/2013" One of those books that probably every mother of a preteen/teen girl ought to read. Interesting. "
— MariLee, 12/8/2012" All parents with daughters should read this book, truly insightful. "
— Leah, 11/6/2012" I highly recommend for any mother of adolescent girls.... "
— Silvia, 9/17/2012" I thought a chapter of this book on describing cliques was really good, but other than that, I thought there wasn't a good flow within the chapters. I wish it were set up a little more organized and exact points on relationship with daughters. "
— Cynthia, 6/7/2012" Useful even in my thirties in a particularly bitchy work environment. A good read, and makes me continue to question the way the educational system creates worlds segregated by age and the problems that brings. "
— Sara, 2/2/2012" This makes me feel like a teenager angry at an overprotective mum. "
— Andrea, 1/19/2012" True and practical. I kind of wish someone had read this to me in fifth grade, or maybe read it to some of my teachers. I don't think reading it would necessarily improve a tough situation. Knowing your position is not unique might help though. "
— Burke, 1/15/2012" Will come in handy as Ava gets older.... "
— Jeannie, 12/24/2011" Read this a few years ago to get insight into my daughters world.. "
— Lissette, 12/20/2011Rosalind Wiseman is an internationally recognized expert on children, parenting, bullying, social justice, and ethical leadership, and the New York Times bestselling author of Queen Bees and Wannabes and Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads.
Lee Adams has been a voice artist for many years. Her work for the Educational Television Network can be heard on an array of videos, television series, station identifications, and commercials. She is also an accomplished singer/songwriter and lends her talents to various animation projects whenever possible. Lee has narrated both fiction and nonfiction audiobooks.