Imagine a world where New
York Times bestselling author, comedian, actor, television, and podcast
host Adam Carolla is the President of the United States. Can’t do it? You don’t
have to! Adam has done it for you!
My fellow Americans,
President John F. Kennedy once famously said, “Hey, is that
blond intern eighteen yet?” He also said, “Ask not what your country can do for
you, but what you can do for your country.”
We’ve changed a lot since JFK asked us all to pitch in. We’ve
become a nation of narcissistic, yoga-mat-toting, service-dog-having, absentee
dads and gluten-free, hand-wringing, hypochondriac moms of over-caffeinated
(yet somehow still lazy) twerking tweens. And our government is an inept
bureaucracy incapable of doing anything except getting in our wallets and in
We’ve got to get it together, America.
That is why I, Adam Carolla, hereby declare myself Candidate
Carolla. President Me is my manifesto, my vision for a better place—free
of big government, barefoot fliers, lazy hipsters who’d rather “occupy” than
work, and the other things that are bringing our country down. With my cabinet
appointees, my list of worthy and necessary presidential ManDates, and tons of
great ideas for fixing our health care, education, energy, and even national
parks systems … behold an America we can be proud of. The America I see in my
You’re welcome in advance.
Your future leader,
Adam Download and start listening now!