Relationship expert and bestselling author Tristan Taormino offers a bold new strategy for creating loving, lasting relationships. Drawing on in-depth interviews with over a hundred women and men, Opening Up explores the real-life benefits and challenges of all styles of open relationships—from partnered non-monogamy to solo polyamory. With her refreshingly down-to-earth style and sharp wit, Taormino offers solutions for making an open relationship work, including tips on dealing with jealousy, negotiating boundaries, finding community, parenting and time management. Opening Up will change the way you think about intimacy.
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"I really enjoyed this book. I was familiar with the concept of polyamory and some of the forms of open relationships, but there were so many examples in this book that it made me fully appreciate just how diverse those labels are. I am in an open relationship, but we're just in the beginning phases so I think this will definitely help me frame things better. I also want my friends to read it so they can understand what I'm talking about. It'll at least help with the crazy looks they give me now..."
— Sally (4 out of 5 stars)
“This is the book you want to read if you’re looking for a voice that is balanced, sensitive, and sensible when tackling the thorny question of sexual boundaries in love relationships. Opening Up is sure to open up your mind.”
— Esther Perel, author of Mating in Captivity“Taormino’s discussion is remarkably nuanced and balanced—and encourages readers to proceed with their eyes wide open.”
— Jack Morin, PhD, author of The Erotic MindThis is the book you want to read if you're looking for a voice that is balanced, sensitive and sensible when tackling the thorny question of sexual boundaries in love relationships. Opening Up is sure to open up your mind.
— Esther Perel, author of Mating in Captivity“Courageous, stunningly thorough, and inspiring. If you need a pathfinding guide for evolving your relationships, this is it.”
— Daphne Rose Kingma, author of The Future of Love" An invaluable resource on all things polyamorous. I couldn't have written my Courtland Chronicles menage series without it. Highly recommended! "
— Cat, 2/17/2014" the profiles illustrate the range of "open relationships" (why are there more women with two husbands in the midwest than anywhere else?). good basic relationship advice proffered. "
— Mary, 2/17/2014" Well done and very thorough. As a practical guide it covers all the basics. Although its not exciting in the same way as ethical slut was and it has quite a large BDSM focus, it has a lot if very practical advice that I haven't seen in other books. "
— Sam, 2/11/2014" A great new resource. I wish there were more personal stories but I appreciate the thought and care that went into this book. "
— Tristy, 2/1/2014" An intelligent, research-based, nuanced, and common-sense book on non-monogamy and polyamory?? Amazing. It reminds me of some of my favorite teaching resources - simultaneously acknowledges that there are no "right answers" AND that there are concrete skills and lessons that can support the success of the endeavor. "
— Anna, 1/26/2014" O hay, book I wish I had read several months before I finally got around to it. A lot of good insight in here for anyone who thinks monogamy might not be the thing for him or her. This book, unlike many others on the subject, gives a fairly balanced perspective on various types of arrangements, and is also notably GLBT inclusive. "
— Cid, 1/23/2014" Very informative book on different types of open relationships. Written from a honest, loving and compassionate point of view, the author identifies the benefits and pit falls of different types of open relationships. She places less emphasis on the sexual aspects and is more concerned with the emotional implications. Excellent read. "
— Erika, 1/18/2014" This book was very informative and helpful as a polyamorous person. I think it provides insights that the Ethical Slut missed. It's THE book I will recommend about polyamory from now on. "
— Micah, 1/13/2014" Best book I've read on the subject. "
— Traci, 12/30/2013" Better than Ethical Slut. Ethical Slut seemed more persuasive. Opening Up is more of a practical guide. "
— Marissa, 12/29/2013" gotta love tristan t. basically covers all topics regarding this subject. not as great as the ethical slut but i think i'm biased since it was the first one that i read. "
— Lauren, 12/19/2013" Good stuff, goes from beginner to hxc. I wonder when we're going to get to the point where books about open relationships don't have to have four or five beginning chapters that justify their motivations to exist in the first place. "
— lola, 12/2/2013" Good advice for most relationships. "
— Kitten., 7/1/2013" I had high hopes for this book. Sadly, it felt like every other book I've ever read about "creating and sustaining open relationships". No panacea here. "
— Jenn, 3/23/2013" Shared a lot of my views on this, and I think it will help me in my current relationship. "
— Belkis, 3/22/2013" I was disappointed that this was such an open relationships 101 primer. I'd like to see a sequel packed with practical tips, ideas, and guidelines. "
— Rory, 3/14/2013" Excellent read for everyone, whether you're into non-monogamy or not. "
— Christina, 1/22/2013" Probably one of the best books on polyamory. Highlights styles, perks, pitfalls, ideas for communication, things to consider, etc. Worthwhile read for anyone interested in non monogamy "
— Punkrockprincess768, 9/24/2012" A new favorite of mine. I was recommending it to people before I'd finished reading it. "
— Morgan, 5/18/2012" A nice and gentle tour through the basics of all the different configurations of polyamory (including some I hadn't considered before). Lots of good basic advice. "
— Praveen, 5/3/2012" This was an interesting and helpful book. It was informative and had good advice for any relationship. It was also more inclusive than the Ethical Slut. "
— Jessie, 1/30/2012" It reads a little bit more like a textbook than a non-fiction work, but it's very well done and I couldn't put it down. "
— Sarah, 1/5/2012" Only took a year for me to finish it... "
— Zana, 10/31/2011" This was an interesting and helpful book. It was informative and had good advice for any relationship. It was also more inclusive than the Ethical Slut. "
— Jessie, 10/27/2011" Better than Ethical Slut. Ethical Slut seemed more persuasive. Opening Up is more of a practical guide. "
— Marissa, 8/23/2011" In short, this book changed my life. "
— Chris, 7/15/2011" Much better than The Ethical Slut, but still a little dry at times. Does cover all the bases, even the ones that don't apply to my life. "
— Bryan, 7/1/2011" Very good book, allot of good information about relationships. Even monogamous people should find many useful tools. I found this to be a much better book then “The Ethical Slut”. "
— Gary, 6/24/2011" It reads a little bit more like a textbook than a non-fiction work, but it's very well done and I couldn't put it down. "
— Sarah, 3/29/2011" Only took a year for me to finish it... "
— Zana, 3/27/2011" An invaluable resource on all things polyamorous. I couldn't have written my Courtland Chronicles menage series without it. Highly recommended! "
— Cat, 12/3/2010" I expected this book to be old news, but it was thought provoking and useful. "
— Sasha, 10/24/2010" A great new resource. I wish there were more personal stories but I appreciate the thought and care that went into this book. "
— Tristy, 2/6/2010Tristan Taormino is an award-winning author, columnist, editor, and educator. She is the author of four books, editor of more than a dozen anthologies, and her popular Village Voice column “Pucker Up” is nationally syndicated. Tristan has been featured in over 250 publications, including the New York Times, Redbook, Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Entertainment Weekly, New York Magazine, and Men’s Health. She has appeared on HBO, CNN, MTV, and the Discovery Channel, and she lectures at top colleges and universities and teaches workshops around the world.
Jo Anna Perrin is an audiobook narrator whose readings include Disarming the Narcissist by Wendy T. Behary, You Lost Me There by Rosecrans Baldwin, American Freak Show by Willie Geist, and many others.