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Download Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir Audiobook

Extended Audio Sample Lets Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir, by Jenny Lawson Click for printable size audiobook cover
3.00017393320965 out of 53.00017393320965 out of 53.00017393320965 out of 53.00017393320965 out of 53.00017393320965 out of 5 3.00 (34,496 ratings) (rate this audio book) Author: Jenny Lawson Narrator: Jenny Lawson Publisher: Penguin Random House Format: Unabridged Audiobook Delivery: Instant Download Audio Length: Release Date:
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Internet sensation Jenny Lawson knocked one out of the park with her book, Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir).

Known as The Bloggess because of her successful blog by the same name, Jenny takes her audience on a journey back through her life, specifically highlighting all of those moments that she'd rather forget. You'll laugh over and over again as she relives and retells those mortifying experiences, and you might even find yourself relating a little bit, and thinking about the embarrassing moments of your own life.

From her strange and unusual life as a child, growing up in Texas, to the comical years she spent in high school attempting to overcome the awkwardness that she seemed to be dealt a double portion of, you might not stop chuckling. Jenny has a way of weaving her "mostly true memoir" that's both entertaining and inspirational. Through it all, Jenny's tales remind us all that these terrible yet memorable moments are really the ones that define your life. They shape you into who you will become. While some might choose to be affected by them negatively, Jenny chose to embrace the gift they gave her, and she learned to laugh just a little bit more.

Let's Pretend This Never Happened debuted in the number one spot on the New York Times Bestseller list. Neilsen has featured her as one of their Top 50 Most Powerful Mom Bloggers. Forbes also listed her blog in their Top 100 Websites For Women. She's written for various publications, yet humor seems to be her niche, as she continues to dazzle her readers with her wit and insight.

If you're looking for a good laugh, and you're a fan of the comedy talents of professionals like Tina Fey and David Sedaris, you'll love this audiobook.

For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris—Internet star Jenny Lawson, a.k.a. The Bloggess, makes her literary debut.

Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives—the ones we’d like to pretend never happened—are in fact the ones that define us. In the #1 New York Times bestseller Let’s Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson takes listeners on a hilarious journey, recalling her bizarre upbringing in rural Texas, her devastatingly awkward high school years, and her relationship with her long-suffering husband, Victor. Chapters include: “Stanley the Magical, Talking Squirrel”; “A Series of Angry Post-It Notes to My Husband”; “My Vagina Is Fine. Thanks for Asking”; “And Then I Snuck a Dead Cuban Alligator on an Airplane.”

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Quotes & Awards

  • There’s something wrong with Jenny Lawson—magnificently wrong. I defy you to read her work and not hurt yourself laughing. Jen Lancaster
  • “Even when I was funny, I wasn’t this funny.”

    Augusten Burroughs, author of Running with Scissors

  • The Bloggess writes stuff that actually is laugh-out-loud, but you know that really you shouldn’t be laughing and probably you’ll go to hell for laughing, so maybe you shouldn’t read it. That would be safer and wiser. Neil Gaiman
  • Jenny Lawson is hilarious, snarky, witty, totally inappropriate, and ‘Like Mother Teresa, Only Better.’ Marie Claire magazine
  • Jenny Lawson’s writing is nothing less than revolutionary. . . . I say this without a hint of exaggeration: She may be one of the most progressive women’s voices of our time. Karen Walrond, author of The Beauty of Different
  • Even when I was funny, I wasn't this funny. Augusten Burroughs, author of Running With Scissors and This is How
  • “Bawdy…Lawson’s self-deprecating humor is not only gaspingly funny and wonderfully inappropriate; it also allows her to speak about subjects like depression, anxiety, and infertility in a real and raw way.”

    O, The Oprah Magazine

  • “If Chelsea Handler had grown up in rural Texas, had a kid, and was a wee bit crazier, she’d be Jenny Lawson.”

    USA Today

  • “The plot, though, is never the point. It’s following the strange paths down which Lawson’s mind wanders…Did a cougar casually stroll through her back yard last week? Does she really have a zombie kit stashed under her bed? Who cares? The world Lawson inhabits, however much invented, is a glorious place to be.”

    Washington Post

  • “Sarcastic and sidesplitting…Lawson knows her material so well that her performance seems more like a stand-up than traditional narration, making this audiobook both entertaining and engaging.”

    Publishers Weekly (starred audio review)

  • “As both author and narrator of this offbeat memoir, Jenny Lawson employs a unique style that is both funny and off-kilter. Imagine Jessica Simpson on truth serum and devoid of inhibitions…[It’s] a platform for Lawson’s insanity, and her narrative persona exudes a lascivious élan that is part stand-up, part literary doppelgänger, and part road-kill recollections…The next Tina Fey has arrived.”


  • “[A] funny, irreverent memoir on the foibles of growing up weird.”

    Kirkus Reviews

  • A #1 New York Times Bestseller
  • A USA Today Bestseller
  • A Los Angeles Times Bestseller
  • Selected for the May 2012 Indie Next List
  • A 2013 Audie Award Finalist for Humor

Listener Opinions

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 by Kiwie | 2/18/2014

    " I laughed a lot. Really that is all I feel like saying about this. Jenny Lawson is funny, and sounds (I heard the audio) really nice and her stories are insane. It got a little bit boring sometimes, but I loved listening to this. It accompanied me on a long car ride and I was surprised when we got home because it hadn't taken as long as I thought it would. So there. Car trip shortener. That has to be a great advantage for an audio book right? "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 by Lauren Muzzi | 2/16/2014

    " I <3 Jenny. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 by Marilyn Francis | 2/10/2014

    " A kind of comic voice I have never heard before, especially from a woman writer. Jenny Lawson is fearless, irreverent and just damn funny- a Dave Barry, Louis CK and George Costanza all rolled into one! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 by Carielle | 2/8/2014

    " A while back there was a blog post that was floating around Pinterest and Facebook. It was about a woman who was going shopping with a friend and was going to buy some towels. Her husband said that she was not to buy more towels because they didn't need them. So she and her friend found this enormous chicken, she bought it, named it Beyonce and set it up on by their front door. Her husband was not amused. I remember reading that and thinking it was hilarious. That post was written by Jenny Lawson and was actually in this book. Her writing seems random and kind of all over the place but it you give it time, she explains why. I really enjoyed this book. I found myself laughing out loud all the way through it. I can see how some might not get into it though, because it really does go all over the place. "

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