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Extended Audio Sample King Dork Audiobook, by Frank Portman Click for printable size audiobook cover
3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 3.00 (4,199 ratings) (rate this audio book) Author: Frank Portman Narrator: Lincoln Hoppe Publisher: Penguin Random House Format: Unabridged Audiobook Delivery: Instant Download Audio Length: Release Date: April 2006 ISBN: 9780739331149
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As John Green, New York Times bestselling author of The Fault in Our Stars said, “King Dork will rock your world.” The cult favorite from Frank Portman, aka Dr. Frank of the Mr. T. Experience, is a book like nothing ever done before--King Dork literally has something for everyone: At least a half-dozen mysteries, love, mistaken identity, girls, monks, books, blood, bubblegum, and rock and roll. This book is based on music--a passion most kids have--and it has original (hilarious) songs and song lyrics throughout.
   When Tom Henderson finds his deceased father’s copy of J. D. Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye, his world is turned upside down. Suddenly high school gets more complicated: Tom (aka King Dork) is in the middle of at least half a dozen mysteries involving dead people, naked people, fake people, a secret code, girls, and rock and roll. As he goes through sophomore year, he finds clues that may very well solve the puzzle of his father’s death and—oddly—reveal the secret to attracting semi-hot girls (the secret might be being in a band, if he can find a drummer who can count to four.
   A brilliant story told in first person, King Dork includes a glossary and a bandography, which readers will find helpful and hilarious.

Praise for King Dork:


“Basically, if you are a human being with even a vague grasp of the English language, King Dork, will rock your world.”—John Green, author of The Fault in Our Stars
 
“[No account of high school] has made me laugh more than King Dork. . . . Grade A.”—Entertainment Weekly
 
“Impossibly brilliant.”—Time

“Provides a window into what it would be like if Holden Caulfield read The Catcher in the Rye.”—New York Post

[STAR] “Original, heartfelt, and sparkling with wit and intelligence. This novel will linger long in readers’ memories.”—School Library Journal, Starred
 
[STAR] “A biting and witty high-school satire.”—Kirkus Reviews, Starred
 
[STAR] “Tom’s narration is piercingly satirical and acidly witty.”—The Bulletin of the Center for Children’s Books, Starred
 
“Loaded with sharp and offbeat humor.”—USA Today
 
“King Dork is smart, funny, occasionally raunchy and refreshingly clear about what it’s like to be in high school.”—San Francisco Chronicle
 
King Dork: Best Punk Rock Book Ever.”—The Village Voice
 
“I love this book as much as I hated high school, and that’s some of the highest praise I can possibly give.”—Bookslut.com Download and start listening now!

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Quotes & Awards

  • Basically, if you are a human being with even a vague grasp of the English language, King Dork, will rock your world. John Green, author of The Fault in Our Stars
  • [No account of high school] has made me laugh more than King Dork. . . . Grade A. Entertainment Weekly
  • Impossibly brilliant. Time
  • “Provides a window into what it would be like if Holden Caulfield read The Catcher in the Rye. New York Post
  • [STAR] “Original, heartfelt, and sparkling with wit and intelligence. This novel will linger long in readers’ memories. School Library Journal, Starred
  • [STAR] “A biting and witty high-school satire. Kirkus Reviews, Starred
  • [STAR] “Tom’s narration is piercingly satirical and acidly witty. The Bulletin of the Center for Children’s Books, Starred
  • King Dork: Best Punk Rock Book Ever. The Village Voice
  • Loaded with sharp and offbeat humor. USA Today
  • I love this book as much as I hated high school, and that’s some of the highest praise I can possibly give. Bookslut.com
  • Just the thing for those snarky teens. People
  • King Dork is smart, funny, occasionally raunchy and refreshingly clear about what it’s like to be in high school. San Francisco Chronicle
  • A funny, pointed poke in the eye to the bloated Catcher in the Rye cult, and also a fine alienated teen novel in its own right. Neal Pollack, author of Never Mind the Pollacks: A Rock and Roll Novel
  • A funny, intelligent, inspiring, can’t-even-put-it-down-when-I-go-to-the-bathroom story. Seriously, I vowed to only write about this well-publicized book after I read it myself, and I’m happy to report that it’s worth the hype. Whitney Matheson in USA Today’s Pop Candy
  • This pitch-perfect mixture of Veronica Mars and Freaks and Geeks exudes realistic, self-aware teen angst on every page, and should be a permanent addition to libraries alongside Brighton Rock, A Separate Peace . . . and even Catcher. The Oregonian
     
  • The magic of King Dork lies in its cutting satire and narrative voice. It smartly skewers just about every aspect of the educational system. For readers who have suffered through a pep rally, detention or English class, Portman’s arrival is cause for regal glee. The Plain Dealer (Cleveland)
  • Frank Portman takes on the high-school coming-of-age story with enough music what-for to satisfy the most ardent of music snobs. He also cuts to pieces Catcher in the Rye, a job you might not have known needed to be done. SF Weekly
  • This is the funniest, freshest, most original book of any kind that I have read in a very long time. It’s so damn good that I’m just happy there are people like Frank Portman writing books. Period. Megan McCafferty, author of Sloppy Firsts, Second Helpings, and Charmed Thirds
  • Frank Portman . . . proves to be a born storyteller in this hilarious coming-of-age novel. Chicago Sun-Times
  • The author’s biting humor and skillful connection of events will keep pages turning. Publishers Weekly
  • Inventive and sexy, [King Dork is] fun to read and provides endless food for thought—everything I want from a book. Melvin Burgess, author of Doing It and Smack
     
  • Portman . . . scores with a debut novel that’s funny, sharp, and spot-on at portraying a teen who sees musical stardom as more attainable than scoring with a girl. Seattle Post-Intelligencer
  • A modern and arguably better (yes, I said it) version of the J. D. Salinger staple. American Way
  • King Dork is unique: a detective-story ode to hormones, teenage bands, and the books they made you read in high school. Hilarious, unflinching, and surprising from start to finish. Ned Vizzini, author of It’s Kind of a Funny Story
  • The MySpace generation’s Catcher in the Rye. Gawker.com
  • The ironically self-crowned dork narrator is a terrific guide through the scary world of high school. E! Online
  • Channeling the wisdom of a cynical rock sophisticate through the voice of a self-conscious fourteen-year-old misfit, Frank Portman has created a winning post-punk Hardy Boy equal. Ira Robbins, TrouserPress.com
  • King Dork is smart, funny, occasionally raunchy and refreshingly clear about what it’s like to be in high school. San Francisco Chronicle

Listener Opinions

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Kenneth | 2/15/2014

    " I ended hitting the groove with this book, even when my expectations were low. Something about relating to the subject matter (albeit separated from the protagonist geographically and by a couple of decades). The narrative may take awhile to get into, but it is a wonderful rendering of high school growing pains. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Bradley | 2/14/2014

    " Not bad. Okay book. About 100 pages too long. First-time writer Frank Portman paints the high-school landscape like it just happened yesterday. However, it's a bit over-written for my tastes. Less is more. Frank Portman should have had a copy editor review his work before he went to publication. It would have made for a better read. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Very | 2/11/2014

    " It was clever but missing that extra-special-something that makes me go ga-ga. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Amanda | 2/1/2014

    " I enjoyed the voice of this book quite a lot. The main character is funny, somewhat self-aware and definitely a teenager. The ending on the other hand, I found a little frustrating and didn't quite buy that Tom would totally give up on the mystery. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Monica | 1/26/2014

    " Adorable and hilarious. Totally appreciate the frankness and intelligence of the tone. Hope to see more good work from Portman. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Maura | 1/23/2014

    " Witty and clever portrayal of loner teens. The literary equivalent of Superbad. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Catie | 1/18/2014

    " I enjoyed this super light read about a dork in high school who is always dreaming up his next band name and creating their play lists, even though they don't always get around to actually making music. A bit of a coming-of-age story for rock star wanna-bes. You are a rock star if you believe it! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Beckett | 12/7/2013

    " Beautiffuly written and clever. Impressive. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Brooke | 6/18/2013

    " This book is in my top favorite books of all time, and it is in a genre far from what I usually read and prefer. That is saying something. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Matt | 5/31/2013

    " This was a lot of fun, although a bit tedious at times. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Dave Roberts | 8/27/2012

    " This is a terrific coming of age novel. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Marilyn | 5/16/2012

    " If you liked CATCHER IN RYE, you might like this stream of blather. Not my cup of tea because I would rather he just got to the point rather than taking me on a long trip to get there. I could see quality in the writing, but still not fun for me to read. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Sally Moen | 3/10/2012

    " I admit that I hated, *hated* this book until about halfway through when I inexplicably started to love it. Overall, it's a funny, quirky look into what it might be like to be an outcast teenage boy. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Leah | 2/29/2012

    " Hillarious. Slightly off-colored, but so funny. Makes me want to read Portman's next, which I think is pretty high praise. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Amanda | 2/22/2012

    " for real - this book ROCKS! I laughed out loud through most of it... "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Fuff Tabachnikoff | 8/20/2011

    " loved this book. i didn't like the young teen girls servicing the boys sexually, that not so much. prompted a discussion with my young teenage daughter, who loved the book. teachable moment? "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Franki | 5/8/2011

    " I thought that it would be really good, but it wasn't. I was really disappointed. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Debbie | 4/30/2011

    " I read an e-mail about people thinking of their favorite characters. I did like the voice in King Dork. I remember thinking it was hillarious. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Ben | 4/22/2011

    " Really funny teen fiction. Recommend it to teen wierdos who like music and feel like outsiders. Kinda got some sexy stuff in it so probably not middle schoolers. But yeah, a pretty good book! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Bri | 4/20/2011

    " His use of words was very funny. I loved his Devil Head thing that popped up. His blunt detail of his $ex experiences was also.....a tad eye opening...over all this is one of the only books I've picked up this year that kept my interest. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Wendy | 4/12/2011

    " One of my go to books. I read it just about every year. Not sure why. I just laugh. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Megan | 4/3/2011

    " Wickedly funny.I wish I'd had this book as a teenager. Again, so-called "adult" fiction flatlines in the face of such vivid storytelling. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Matt | 3/29/2011

    " Had potential at the beginning, but then feel flat and I couldn't even finish it. Has the occasional comedic moment, but the characters are unlikable and the plot is boring. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Elescia | 3/23/2011

    " A great young adult book that doesn't feature vampires or werewolves or anything supernatural. Just some totally dorky, zit-faced high school guys trying to start a band. As a musician (and former zit-faced kid in high school trying to start a band) I can completely relate! "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Kyle | 2/17/2011

    " This was sweet and weird and improbable in the best of ways. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Jbaby | 2/3/2011

    " dont understand. such a watse of my time and i normally try to give books time. this sucks. srry just my opinion.hate if u want but i dish it out. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Karen | 2/1/2011

    " I will wanted to love this book and find it clever and witty, but it just didn't quite hit the mark. "

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About the Author
Author Frank Portman

Frank Portman (aka Dr. Frank) is the author of King Dork, King Dork Approximately, and Andromeda Klein. He is the singer, songwriter, and guitarist of the influential East Bay punk band the Mr. T Experience (MTX).

About the Narrator

Lincoln Hoppe is an accomplished actor of stage and screen with several films, plays, television shows, and numerous audiobooks to his credit. His audiobook narrations have earned him nine AudioFile Earphones Awards. His diverse voice characterizations can be heard on animated films, video games, and commercials across the globe. He is a member of the Lost Angeles Comedy Sportz Improv Company.