A gripping and unsettling portal into the life of a woman
who lives in many worlds, some wildly far from and some eerily near to our own
As children we all had our imaginary friends and monsters in
the closet. But for Suzan Saxman, those friends and monsters didn’t go away—and
they weren’t imaginary.
From an early age, Suzan knew instinctively that she had to
hide her true self. She couldn’t talk about the specters that haunted her,
waking and dreaming. In bed with a childhood fever, rat-faced winged beings
guarded her; bullied and friendless at school, she ate lunch silently under the
steps of St. Theresa’s with the ghost of a nun; paralyzed with fear, she woke
each night to see a man with no eyes, watching her; and she kept watch at the
window, every day, while her Daddy was at work and Steve, her real father, was
with her mother. It was the 1960s, suburban Staten Island, and she tried to
hide it, tried to silence the spirits, ghosts, and demons, tried to be a
daughter her mother could love. Like many memoirs, Suzan’s is the story of a
mother and a daughter: of a mother who refused to accept both her strangely
gifted daughter and her own personal buried secrets and of a daughter who grew
more and more isolated as she floated adrift in a family to which she did not
feel she belonged.
Now, with Perdita Finn, Suzan tells the story of her journey,
revealing and celebrating both the joy and terror, the fulfillment and sadness
of a life lived between worlds, the loneliness and power of seeing and
understanding things no one else can. Download and start listening now!