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Extended Audio Sample You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story Audiobook, by Annabelle Gurwitch Click for printable size audiobook cover
3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 3.00 (721 ratings) (rate this audio book) Author: Annabelle Gurwitch, Jeff Kahn Narrator: Annabelle Gurwitch, Jeff Kahn, Todd Ross Publisher: Recorded Books, LLC Format: Unabridged Audiobook Delivery: Instant Download Audio Length: Release Date: February 2010 ISBN: 9781440790805
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In this hilarious and ultimately moving memoir, comedians and real-life married couple Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn prove that in marriage, all you need is love—and a healthy dose of complaining, codependence, and pinot noir.
 
After thirteen years of being married, Annabelle and Jeff have found “We’re just not that into us.” Instead of giving up, they’ve held their relationship together by ignoring conventional wisdom and fostering a lack of intimacy, by using parenting as a competitive sport, and by dropping out of couples therapy. The he-said/she-said chronicle of their intense but loving marriage includes an unsentimental account of the medical odyssey that their family embarked upon after their infant son was diagnosed with VACTERL, a very rare series of birth defects. Annabelle and Jeff’s unforgivingly raw, uproariously funny story is sure to strike both laughter and terror in the hearts of all couples (not to mention every single man or woman who is contemplating the connubial state).
 
Serving up equal parts sincerity and cynicism, You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up is a laugh-out-loud must-read for everyone who has come to realize that being “in love” can only get you so far.

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Quotes & Awards

  • You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up: A Love Story shows how hectic, hard, and hilarious married life can be. Spanning friendship, courtship, marriage and parenthood, Annabelle Gurwitch and Jeff Kahn’s ‘he said/she said’ memoir at times reads like a mix of couples therapy and ‘Real World’ confessionals for grown-ups. Only funnier and heavier.”

    Washington Post

  • “This book is a must-read for couples and singles alike. Finally, a married couple that doesn’t hide behind such tedious traits as personal loyalty, good taste, and an overall sense of decorum. You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up tells people what marriage is really like!”

    Liz Tucillo, co-author of He’s Just Not That Into You and author of How to Be Single

  • “So funny because it is so accurate. Kahn and Gurwitch illuminate the insanity of marriage. They make you want to embrace your spouse for the same reason you want to strangle them.”

    Ben Stiller, comedian

  • “Oh, now I get it. This whole sham of a marriage was not just for tax purposes, it was also to write and sell this immediately engaging book! I remember when Jeff first told me about Annabelle and the hazy, humid thermal cloud she wrapped his head in. I thought he was nuts. Turns out I was right…After reading this book, I feel sorry for both of them now. And that’s quite an accomplishment.”

    David Cross, comedian and author of I Drink for a Reason

Listener Opinions

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Royale | 2/19/2014

    " Not great literature, but some very funny parts. Objectionable language for some and I found some of their behaviors bizarre, but entertaining. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Dana | 2/10/2014

    " Fantastic audiobook. Very funny take on marriage. I think having these two funny authors read the book made the experience much more enjoyable than reading it in print. My only issue with the book was a few unnecessary "raunchy" sexual references, but otherwise, I loved everything else in this book. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Melissa Reddick | 2/6/2014

    " It started off witty and creative but lost that for me. Retelling each story from each spouse is a little too redundant for me. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Deedee Light | 2/3/2014

    " This is not a love story. This a tale of two people, married, miserable and morose, living lives in their heads that they dare not share with each other. It's told as if two stories (he said, she said)and the shear grin and bear it of the novel is page turns of pain. Do not recommend. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Vicki | 1/25/2014

    " After reading this, I wonder why these people are still married, as they seem to do nothing but fight! But then I think that they are both very funny people exaggerating their conflicts for comic effect (I hope). The book isn't just funny, though, it contains a lot of thought-provoking stuff. It might be a very interesting book discussion title. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Francesca | 1/22/2014

    " Just too funny. It's the perfect Playaway audio; I got lots of funny looks as I snickered and laughed out loud while listening while in public places. Hopeful, hilarious relationship anecdotes. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Amber | 1/18/2014

    " his was really funny and entertaining most of the time. Annabelle and Jeff are so determined to win the competition for worst marriage that sometimes it gets tiresome. They seem to take pride in pointing out how miserable they are in their marriage, sometimes you're just wondering why they're still together. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Alioh | 1/17/2014

    " I wouldn't rave about it, bit kind of funny, and easy to read. a little like being in on couples therapists at times, good message at the end I guess. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Annette | 1/12/2014

    " A little raunchy (the guy writes for Ben Stiller movies), but often accurate and hilarious in its take on marriage. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Margotreynolds | 1/11/2014

    " Lol funny. A bit repetitive. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Thebestdogmom Stiner | 12/25/2013

    " zzzzz. Couldn't read more than 30 pages. I thought it was supposed to be funny? "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Laurie | 12/24/2013

    " The intro and first chapter were great - I laughed out loud several times. It kind of goes downhill from there. While he is funny, she comes off as mean and uncaring. It gets tiresome. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Sara | 12/9/2013

    " While it is occasionally funny, I deeply disliked both of these people after reading 3/4 of this book and decided to move on to the many other books I hope don't include such nauseating narcissism. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Amy Gulbranson | 7/26/2013

    " Abandoned this one as I've read similar books before. Funny writing just not new to me. Its the Mars-Venus thing. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Jocelyn | 5/16/2013

    " At first I thought what a crazy lady the wife was (even towards the end of the book she still is crazy) but even with all her craziness, their marriage worked out especially in the growing up process of their sick son. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Maureen | 5/10/2013

    " Laugh out loud funny and the adage rings true: there is truth in jest. :) "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Brenna | 4/29/2013

    " Loved it! It was hilarious. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Jess | 4/23/2013

    " Stupid title, but I thought this book was hilarious and heartfelt. Totally worth a read on a snow day! "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Kathy | 12/21/2012

    " Not what I initially expected! I did find the book entertaining as it pretty much depicts marraige in in the current decade. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Cathy | 7/15/2012

    " This was a book club book that I just couldn't get through. I made it through the first quarter and decided I'd read far enough. Just too much information about another couples love story for me. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Emily | 3/21/2012

    " This was a funny book. I liked their arguing but still loving each other through everything. It wasn't quite as silly as I thought it would be, and that's for the best. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Dani Janisch | 10/11/2011

    " Funny, irreverant and gets pretty old about half way through. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Jeffrey Sorg | 8/6/2011

    " Quick, hilarious marriage memoir written by a husband and wife. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Alison | 7/15/2011

    " Although both Jeff and Annabelle can turn a phrase, their spiky characterizations of each other and their marriage mostly repelled rather than amused me. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Paula Lyle | 6/27/2011

    " Loved the title, not so much the book. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Jimmy | 6/11/2011

    " Some funny points, but it is a stretch to try keep people interested by only making jokes the way through. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Marc | 6/9/2011

    " Tess like it more than I did. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Vickie | 5/30/2011

    " He said, she said story of a marriage. Funny stuff. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Inna | 5/11/2011

    " Great read, doesn't really offer much for marriage advice, but very pleasant to read. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Chelle | 4/3/2011

    " The He Said, She Said format of this book was fun, but I found myself wondering how much of the writing was persona versus real people. If you enjoyed the unlikable but irresistible characters from Seinfeld, you will like this book. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Joyce | 3/19/2011

    " HIghly recommend! I could have easily read 100 more pages. Summary: A hilarious and ultimately moving memoir, "You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up" tells about one couple's reliance on complaining, co-dependence, and a healthy supply of Pinot Noir to keep their marriage and sanity intact. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Laurie | 3/17/2011

    " The intro and first chapter were great - I laughed out loud several times. It kind of goes downhill from there. While he is funny, she comes off as mean and uncaring. It gets tiresome. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Francesca | 3/5/2011

    " Just too funny. It's the perfect Playaway audio; I got lots of funny looks as I snickered and laughed out loud while listening while in public places. Hopeful, hilarious relationship anecdotes. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Pat | 3/2/2011

    " Was funny and clever. A bit crude. Gives a man's perspective on marriage. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Liz | 2/26/2011

    " Just couldn't get into this book. They're funny writers, but I found I didn't care what they had to say after the 1st chapter or so. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Alison | 2/19/2011

    " Although both Jeff and Annabelle can turn a phrase, their spiky characterizations of each other and their marriage mostly repelled rather than amused me. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Anne | 2/16/2011

    " Kind of a depressing look at marriage. They try to make it funny, but they are pretty mean to each other. "

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About the Author
Author Annabelle Gurwitch

Annabelle Gurwitch is an actress and writer, known for her years cohosting Dinner and a Movie on TBS and Fired!, both a book and documentary. She’s been a regular commentator on NPR and online columnist for The Nation. Currently, she hosts the series WA$TED on Planet Green Network. She lives with her husband, Jeff Kahn, and their son in Los Angeles.

About the Narrator

Jeff Kahn won an Emmy Award for his writing on The Ben Stiller Show. As an actor, he has appeared in The 40-Year-Old Virgin and Tropic Thunder, as well as the HBO series Curb Your Enthusiasm and Entourage. He lives with his wife Annabelle Gurwitch in Los Angeles.