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Ready for Absolutely Nothing: A Memoir Audiobook, by Susannah Constantine Play Audiobook Sample

Ready for Absolutely Nothing: A Memoir Audiobook

By: Susannah Constantine
Ready for Absolutely Nothing: A Memoir Audiobook, by Susannah Constantine Play Audiobook Sample
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Read By: Susannah Constantine Publisher: Hachette Books Listen Time: at 1.0x Speed 6.67 hours at 1.5x Speed 5.00 hours at 2.0x Speed Release Date: January 2023 Format: Unabridged Audiobook ISBN: 9781668619742
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Quick Stats About this Audiobook

Total Audiobook Chapters:

90

Longest Chapter Length:

20:07 minutes

Shortest Chapter Length:

24 seconds

Average Chapter Length:

06:43 minutes

Audiobooks by this Author:

1

Publisher Description

This darkly funny, confessional memoir from the star of What Not to Wear tells all: from her posh upbringing and the dishy details of her career in fashion to her journey as a recovering alcoholic.

The fact that Susannah Constantine made her name as a 'style guru' as part of “Trinny and Susannah” from What Not to Wear is the least interesting thing about her. Susannah grew up amongst the great and good of British aristocracy and (unwittingly) trained to be a society bride. Fittingly, Barbara Cartland was her touchstone for romance: she wanted to be the underdog heroine who ended up marrying a prince. Instead she dated Princess Margaret’s son for several years and traveled in royal circles, including on the island of Mustique, where Princess Margaret–and Hachette author Anne Glenconner–owned homes and had holidays. When that marriage proposal never showed up, she dated Imran Khan –then a gorgeous playboy/cricket player and now the Prime Minister of Pakistan, before meeting her husband.

Hers is a tale full to the brim with extraordinary anecdotes. From lavatory dramas with Princess Margaret, to behind-the-scenes power struggles between Margaret Thatcher and the Queen at Balmoral and eye-opening sex-club etiquette with pop royalty–her social landscape has been nothing if not varied. Many of these stories are hilarious and snarky, some are painful, but all of them are honest, gossipy, and show that, in her words, she was “brought up to be ready for absolutely nothing.” In sharing a peek behind the curtain, Constantine does not hold back and many bold names appear in these pages from Elton John, Princess Diana, The Queen, Mick Jagger, Jerry Hall, Andy Warhol, and our own Anne Glenconner and her husband Colin Tenant.

But appearances are deceptive and beneath the balls and glamour, life has had a darker side: her mother's bipolar disorder, her father's inability to cope and her own subsequent alcoholism. Somehow, she had to forge her own life, away from the expectations of others. Which she did and does.

 

READY FOR ABSOLUTELY NOTHING is for fans of The Crown, royal followers, readers of LADY IN WAITING, What Not To Wear fans and anyone who likes a gossipy memoir with bold faced names and a drop dead sense of humor.

The fact that Susannah Constantine made her name as a 'style guru' as part of “Trinny and Susannah” from What Not to Wear is the least interesting thing about her. Susannah grew up amongst the great and good of British aristocracy and (unwittingly) trained to be a society bride. Fittingly, Barbara Cartland was her touchstone for romance: she wanted to be the underdog heroine who ended up marrying a prince. Instead she dated Princess Margaret’s son for several years and traveled in royal circles, including on the island of Mustique, where Princess Margaret–and Hachette author Anne Glenconner–owned homes and had holidays. When that marriage proposal never showed up, she dated Imran Khan –then a gorgeous playboy/cricket player and now the Prime Minister of Pakistan, before meeting her husband.

Hers is a tale full to the brim with extraordinary anecdotes. From lavatory dramas with Princess Margaret, to behind-the-scenes power struggles between Margaret Thatcher and the Queen at Balmoral and eye-opening sex-club etiquette with pop royalty–her social landscape has been nothing if not varied. Many of these stories are hilarious and snarky, some are painful, but all of them are honest, gossipy, and show that, in her words, she was “brought up to be ready for absolutely nothing.” In sharing a peek behind the curtain, Constantine does not hold back and many bold names appear in these pages from Elton John, Princess Diana, The Queen, Mick Jagger, Jerry Hall, Andy Warhol, and our own Anne Glenconner and her husband Colin Tenant.

But appearances are deceptive and beneath the balls and glamour, life has had a darker side: her mother's bipolar disorder, her father's inability to cope and her own subsequent alcoholism. Somehow, she had to forge her own life, away from the expectations of others. Which she did and does.

 

READY FOR ABSOLUTELY NOTHING is for fans of The Crown, royal followers, readers of LADY IN WAITING, What Not To Wear fans and anyone who likes a gossipy memoir with bold faced names and a drop dead sense of humor.

Download and start listening now!

Shrewd, funny, ideally candid and written with great confidence, brio and aplomb. A feisty, thought-provoking delight.

— William Boyd, author of Any Human Heart and A Good Man in Africa 

Quotes

  • Absolutely brilliant.

    — Elton John

  • Wonderfully written, very funny, but more than anything completely genuine.

    — Lady Anne Glenconner, author of Lady in Waiting

  • We lunched better than we danced.

    — Anton Du Beke, author of The Buckingham Series and host of Strictly Come Dancing”

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