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Race Me in a Lobster Suit: Absurd Internet Ads and the Real Conversations That Followed Audiobook
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Knit me into a cocoon. Help me eat a burrito. Pretend to be a chair at my dinner party. Wrestle a Komodo dragon. Race me in a lobster suit. Author Kelly Mahon posts absurd gig ads online, and shares the conversations she had with the brave souls who wanted the job.
We’re living in a gig economy. But would you respond to an online ad seeking someone to search for escaped ants? Or take an offer for a free tattoo by someone who “needs the practice?” How about a mattress for sale “tainted by geriatric love” or a workout plan that involves throwing Virginia hams? And if you hit reply, and the poster is sketchy about the details or offers to pay you with a gift card for clams, how long would you keep the conversation going?
When New York City copywriter Kelly Mahon started posting weird, fake gig ads as a creative outlet, she found that there was someone interested in every bizarre offer she came up with. And the subsequent awkward email threads were equally hilarious and bizarre. Race Me in a Lobster Suit collects Mahon’s funniest fabrications, plus the hysterical email conversations that followed as she ratcheted up the crazy. While some respondents become suspicious, others seem willing to play along with the joke. And don’t worry, everyone involved agreed to share their emails in the book, so there are no hard feelings.
In a world where it seems like everyone’s suspicious of everyone else, it’s nice to know that there are still people who will at least consider helping a stranger reenact a recurring spider nightmare or explain the principles of pig Latin to a baffled mother of three.
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“This is bite-size comedy you’ll devour.”
— Booklist
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“Hilarious, good fun.”
— Huffington Post
Awards
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Nominated for a 2019 Voice Arts Award
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About Kelly Mahon
Kelly Mahon is an advertising copywriter based in New York City, where she works at the digital agency 360i.
About the Narrators
Dara Rosenberg is an accomplished voice-over artist who has been recognized nationally for her extensive work in audiobooks and commercials. She has a BFA in drama from NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts and studied at Interlochen Arts Academy, where she majored in drama and musical theater.
Suzy Jackson is an Earphones Award–winning audiobook narrator whose readings include several novels by Charlane Harris, Jodi Picoult, and M. L. N. Hanover. She was co-winner of an Audie Award in 2018 for Best Multi-Voiced Performance.
L. J. Ganser is a multiple Audie Award–winning narrator with over six hundred titles recorded to date. Prized for versatility, his work ranges from preschool books to crime noir thrillers, from astronomical adventures in both science and science fiction, to Arctic Circle high school basketball stories. He lives in New York City with his family and dog, Mars.
Dan Bittner is an actor and voice talent and winner of several AudioFile Earphones Awards for audio narration. He has starred on stage and on the screen, in movies such as Men in Black, Adventureland, and the Producers: The Movie Musical. He has also appeared onstage as Macbeth and Sherlock Holmes in the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.
Michael David Axtell is a voice talent and audiobook narrator.
Lauren Fortgang, a graduate of Fordham University’s Theater Program, is an actress, costume designer, and narrator. She has recorded everything from video games to textbooks. Her audiobook narrations have earned AudioFile Earphones Awards and placed her as a finalist for an Audie Award in 2014.
Blair Underwood is an author and award-winning actor, director, and producer. He lives in Los Angeles, California.