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Lord Vishnus Love Handles: A Spy Novel (Sort Of) Audiobook, by Will Clarke Play Audiobook Sample

Lord Vishnu's Love Handles: A Spy Novel (Sort Of) Audiobook

Lord Vishnus Love Handles: A Spy Novel (Sort Of) Audiobook, by Will Clarke Play Audiobook Sample
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Read By: William Dufris Publisher: Tantor Listen Time: at 1.0x Speed 6.00 hours at 1.5x Speed 4.50 hours at 2.0x Speed Release Date: July 2005 Format: Unabridged Audiobook ISBN: 9781400171750

Quick Stats About this Audiobook

Total Audiobook Chapters:

105

Longest Chapter Length:

07:06 minutes

Shortest Chapter Length:

03:22 minutes

Average Chapter Length:

05:06 minutes

Audiobooks by this Author:

2

Other Audiobooks Written by Will Clarke: > View All...

Publisher Description

Lord Vishnu's Love Handles is the story of a man who is teetering on the edge of financial ruin and insanity until a couple of secret agents teach him what it really means to lose his mind.

Travis Anderson has a psychic gift. Or so he thinks. So far he's milked his premonitions only to acquire an upper-middle-class lifestyle — pretty wife, big house, and a shiny Range Rover — without having to make any real effort. But recent visions threaten his yuppie contentment. Haunted by omens of impending cancers, stillborn babies, and personal train wrecks, he is compelled to make a series of inaccurate and horrifying prophecies that humiliate him in front of his fellow country club members. The IRS gets Travis's number, too, demanding an audit of his sloppy bookkeeping.

Drowning in mounting financial problems and apparent mental illness, Travis tries booze, pills, even golf to stay afloat, but nothing works. His wife and friends are forced to stage an intervention. Travis is in danger of losing his family, his career, and ultimately, his sanity. That is, until he meets a Hindu holy man in rehab who claims to be the final incarnation of Lord Vishnu. Suddenly, the tragically shallow Travis is saddled with the responsibility of bettering mankind and saving the world.

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"This book was equal parts bizarre and funny. That expression/bumper-sticker "Just cuz I'm paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get me," could be the epitaph for the main character of this novel. I don't want to say too much about the book because I'd hate to ruin the surprises. Let's just say it's a pretty original concept, and it works."

— Melora (4 out of 5 stars)

Lord Vishnu's Love Handles Listener Reviews

Overall Performance: 3.4473684210526314 out of 53.4473684210526314 out of 53.4473684210526314 out of 53.4473684210526314 out of 53.4473684210526314 out of 5 (3.45)
5 Stars: 3
4 Stars: 17
3 Stars: 14
2 Stars: 2
1 Stars: 2
Narration: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 (0.00)
5 Stars: 0
4 Stars: 0
3 Stars: 0
2 Stars: 0
1 Stars: 0
Story: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 (0.00)
5 Stars: 0
4 Stars: 0
3 Stars: 0
2 Stars: 0
1 Stars: 0
Write a Review
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This is a wacky, unpredictable book. At times creepy, pathetic, annoying, it in nonetheless an entertaining and quick read. "

    — Anne, 2/13/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Another crazy book that was just too funny, never quite sure if the main character is really a spy or is just psychotic. "

    — Debby, 2/8/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Absolutely entertaining, especially if you like psychics, spies, video games and karma...gotta love karma... "

    — Mscout, 1/31/2014
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Rather a mindless read, but humorous all the same. There are some fantastic parts, which provide endless amusement. Relatively original plotline- reminded me vaguely of Carl Hiaasen. "

    — Megan, 1/30/2014
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I found this book rivetting! Admittedly, I was in the minority in my book club with that assessment, however. I find Clarke's ability to weave in and out of a narrative so seamlessly very refreshing. It was great to read a story that you could fundamentally not believe a word that was being written--it was great! Bravo Will Clarke! Bravo! "

    — Ben, 1/21/2014
  • Overall Performance: 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Sometimes, I read a book solely because of its TITLE. And so I bought this one. The title was the best thing about it. Very light fluff. "

    — Niks, 1/20/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Never a dull moment...fun because it's set here in Dallas. "

    — Chelsea, 1/20/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Fun, quick read. I'm not sure I'd really recommend it to friends, but I definitely enjoyed it. It's kind of science fictiony, but the narrator has a great voice -- kind of an edgier Hornby. "

    — Zachary, 1/19/2014
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book I found in the clearance bin at Borders for $4. I greatly enjoyed it. Quick fun read. A comic satire of a spy novel about an alcoholic psychic's adventures. "

    — Erin, 12/27/2013
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book was really fun, it's kind of sci/fi-y but I still liked it. Plus it's set in Dallas! "

    — Alex, 12/23/2013
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Fast read that really held my attention throughout. Somewhat mindless entertainment, but entertainment for sure. Clarke is hilarious and occasionally leaves you asking what could possibly happen next. I cannot wait to pick up another of his novels. "

    — Kevin, 12/19/2013
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book is crazy, but crazy in a good way. Clarke reminds me of Moore a bit. The psychic action moves fast. There are some great lines and just enough depth to make it all worthwhile. The book definitely pushes 3.5 stars. "

    — Dave, 12/4/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I laughed out loud several times. This book is a lot of fun. "

    — Steph, 11/18/2013
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " one of the most poorly written novels I've enjoyed reading. "

    — Chris, 9/24/2013
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " The fact that my dear friend Will Clarke wrote this has nothing to do with how much it made me laugh. It's a caper novel meets tongue-in-cheek spiritual guide meets thriller. Love the characters! "

    — Asproreps, 9/14/2013
  • Overall Performance: 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Great book by a local author. Clarke is a bit insolent, so if you can get past the language it's an original story that provides a good laugh. Though not one you want to leave laying around for the kids to peruse... "

    — Brandy, 9/6/2013
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This was actually a pretty good story once I got passed the strangeness of the main character. A quick read with lots of action that actaully makes you laugh. By the end I found myself rooting for the main character even though he is a borderline psychotic alcoholic with a foul mouth. "

    — Lacie, 12/12/2012
  • Overall Performance: 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " I am constantly looking for easy to read entertainment books with different points of views, especially male, and Joe, this is a dude-lit book if I have ever seen one. Funny sometimes, but mostly not... "

    — Cheryl, 12/12/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " The author may curse more than Fernando does... "

    — Jess, 10/31/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Not bad. A little manic at times, but it was easy (and entertaining) enough to plow through. "

    — doug, 7/12/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " It's a quick read, and the story started to get sloppy towards the end. However it's hard not to love the main character if you're imagining him talking like Kenny Powers from Eastbound and Down. Very funny. "

    — Melissa, 4/17/2012
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Nothing really happens in the 1st or 2nd chapter but later on I find out it is quite difficult to drop the book before I complete reading it. It's very funny and somehow I can think of it as a motion picture. It's corny, but in a lovable way. "

    — Sylvia, 4/2/2012
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book was so damn funny! SO FUNNY! "

    — Amanda, 11/14/2011
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book was OK. The premise was interesting and there were a lot of funny, entertaining moments. But the characters were really unsympathetic, the storyline a bit ridiculous and the constant foul language seemed to indicate a lack of intelligence and vocabulary. "

    — Shannan, 9/12/2011
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " "Shelby is a slut. She is also my wife." What a way to open a story! A fun and quick read. I gave it a "3" because although I enjoyed it immensely, I do not believe I would read it a second time. "

    — Mawgojzeta, 8/20/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This was a wacky book, the book jacket compared it to Hunter S. Thompson, but I thought it was more like Christopher Moore. "

    — Mary, 3/31/2011
  • Overall Performance: 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book is stupid. I can't even begin to express my displeasure with it. Don't waste your time. "

    — Jacqueline, 3/11/2011
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " not much into frats, but the ghosts perspective was pretty cool if a bit immature "

    — Elizabeth, 1/20/2011
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book was fantastic. From the very beginning I was hooked. I could not wait to find out exactly what would happen, if Ryan would get caught and how the hazing would turn out. The ending was the real kicker, I'm not sure if it could of ended any other way.<br/><br/> "

    — Tara, 11/15/2010
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " my husband and i really enjoyed reading this one to each<br/>other. "

    — Teraysa, 7/21/2010
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " As someone who spent a fair amount of years in a Southern greek system, I really enjoyed this spin on the events that happen behind closed fraternity and sorority doors. The story is funny at times, empathetic at others, and is one that has stuck with me since finishing the read. "

    — Anna, 9/14/2009
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " After hearing Will Clarke speak at the Texas Library Association's Conference last year, I was eager to read his book, &quot;The Worthy&quot;. It's a pretty graphic ghost story in regards to hazing but entertaining. Some of the hazing descriptions may not be for the faint of heart. "

    — Amber, 3/2/2009
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Very very funny and very brutal rendition of Greek life in college. The plot was so so but was more than made up for in the humor and hyper realistic situations. "

    — Christopher, 10/26/2008
  • Overall Performance: 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Hilarious book about a frat ghost who was murdered. "

    — Janet, 9/5/2008
  • Overall Performance: 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Reminded me of why I never went Greek in college. Godo story and great characters. "

    — Matt, 7/23/2008
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " Not as funny as Lord Vishnu, but still had some very humorous parts. Maybe because while it was published second, it was actually written first. I originally thought I was going to give it only 3 stars, but the ending had me hooked and I didn't want to put it down. "

    — Julie, 5/20/2008
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This book was aptly described as &quot;The Lovely Bones&quot; meets &quot;Animal House.&quot; A humorous story of the ghost of a fraternity pledge who is trying to get revenge against the fraternity president who killed him during Hell Week hazing. <br/> "

    — Erik, 4/19/2008
  • Overall Performance: 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Narration Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5 Story Rating: 0 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 50 out of 5

    " This is a guy book about frats. Very sick, but good. I nver want Bray to be in a frat after reading this book! "

    — Cmayorga, 4/18/2008

About Will Clarke

Will Clarke is an American novelist who is the author of Lord Vishnu’s Love Handles: A Spy Novel (sort of) and The Worthy: A Ghost’s Story. A native of Lousiana, Clarke’s books eventually became underground hits in the early part of the 2000s. Both books have been selected as the New York Times Editors’ Choice while Clarke was named the “Hot Pop Prophet” by Rolling Stone magazine in 2006.

About William Dufris

William Dufris attended the University of Southern Maine in Portland-Gorham before pursuing a career in voice work in London and then the United States. He has won more than twenty AudioFile Earphones Awards, was voted one of the Best Voices at the End of the Century by AudioFile magazine, and won the prestigious Audie Award in 2012 for best nonfiction narration. He lives with his family in Maine.