Psychologist Dr. Robin Smith reveals how to turn vows made at the altar into realistic plans for a long and happy marriage.
Dr. Robin Smith advises couples on how to take the wedding vows that were made in earnest and in innocence, to a level where they can be used to build a happy, healthy, satisfying and long-lasting marriage. Lies at the Altar is for couples who are planning marriage, are newly married, or who have been married for years.
In Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages, Dr. Robin Smith addresses the unspoken needs, unasked questions, outrageous expectations, and hidden agendas that often linger beneath the surface of the wedding vows and appear later to cause power struggles, suffering, and feelings of hopelessness in marriages.
Dr. Smith discusses why it's important to have one's "eyes wide open" in a marriage; how to write true vows to live by; and why it's never too late to rewrite your vows. She illustrates her advice with detailed stories from her own life, as well as from couples that she has counseled. And in her inspiring conclusion, she invites couples to light up their lives by acknowledging each other as individuals, each of whom lights a candle, and who lights a third candle which represents "us".
Calling "truth" the secret ingredient of great marriages, Dr. Smith teaches individuals and couples how to find the truth within themselves and their partners, whether they are heading to the altar, suffering in an unhappy marriage, divorced, or simply want to bring more satisfaction and intimacy into their relationship.
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"Dr. Smith gets right to the point in this must read book for anyone seriously considering marriage. Too many people romanticize marriage to the point that they never talk with their partner about the major points of a partnership; the issues that often times are causes for divorce. There is an actual list of issues to go through so that you and your partner can incite conversation on serious issues that otherwise may not have come up. I highly recommend this book."
— Brooke (4 out of 5 stars)
" Great book...every woman (and man) should read it......very useful "
— Yulia, 2/13/2014" This should be a must read for all couples. "
— Karen, 2/13/2014" I don't drink the Oprah kool-aid, but I found this book to be very practical and useful. It had unique ideas and concepts that I hadn't thought about before. I also like the phrase "show up as a grown up." "
— Ginger, 2/5/2014" I really am enjoying this book. Brings a lot of insite into all types of relationships and just as the title implies, there are a lot of lies told at the altar. I feel confident as a newly wed, but have found good advice and things to think about. "
— Amanda, 1/31/2014" I thought the start of the book was just giving people excuses to get a divorce. I was listening to this book and I kept thinking as depressed Robin Smith sounded. I think she needs to stop being negative and eats some carbs. Overall, the author states the obvious at times and is over dramatic... read the book if you need an excuse out of a relationship.... "
— Liz, 1/24/2014" This author "tells it like it is." I liked her examples and ideas. The questions are helpful for those who are considering marriage or those who are married and wish to discuss them. "
— Angela, 1/3/2014" one of the book that people in relationship have to read so they can enter their relationship with an open eye n mind "
— agatha, 12/16/2013" I love Dr. Robin, so sensible! "
— suzy, 11/29/2013" There's a very good list of questions in here worth asking your significant other before you get engaged. Otherwise, the author seems to have been motivated by a bitter experience to write this and is perhaps too religion-based for the average joe (or jane). "
— Lsuliv, 10/19/2013" I'm definitely not a self-help book reader. This book was given to me by a friend when I got engaged in 2005. I didn't read it until now (2009). I was nodding the whole time I read it. It has some good, common sense relationship advice. "
— Kim, 10/6/2013" good for anyone, in any stage of their love (single, married, engaged) who is interested in having an authentic relationship. "
— Erin, 9/28/2013" Awesome book for those married / hoping to get married and have a solid relationship. Author has many exercises for couples and questions, not intuitively though about when discussing getting married/relationships. "
— Jleigh, 9/19/2013" Great book to those thinking about getting married or already married. Talks a lot about being completely honest about who you are to your significant other. "
— Katie, 9/12/2013" i liked the anecdotes the author gave from her practice. had some good insights, but a lot of it was common sense. didn't try the marriage exercises she gave. "
— Marta, 6/12/2013" Nothing spectacular, but a good view on marriage. "
— Alicia, 10/26/2012" i got this book before we got married to "not think its honeymoon forever" it was helpful and then i realized DAMN we dont need this book we've been through ALOT being together for 8 YEARS before we got engaged haha "
— Goddesshollylighter, 10/8/2012" Going to finish this book and have some deep thoughts w/Jack Handy about my impending nuptuals. "
— Nicole, 3/20/2012" This had some good information about sustaining a positive relationship with a spouse, but it was a tad bit extreme sometimes. All in all decent advice. "
— Raina, 2/17/2012" I finished about 2/3 of it. They should have had someone besides the author narrate the audio version. She seemed like she was reading someone else's book instead of her own. That took away from the essence of the book, but it was otherwise okay. Good relationship pointers. "
— Antoinette, 8/6/2011" awesome book...for anyone- in a relationship or not, married or not. I was hooked- I don't normally read a lot, or finish a book fast, but this one I read in a couple of days. "
— Mary, 7/22/2011" Perfect book to read prior to marriage. Allows you to explore many topics prior to marriage! "
— Emily, 4/7/2011" This is a book that I will revisit again and again. A great look at the psychology of marriages and unmet expectations. "
— Kimberly, 1/18/2011" Many truths about getting married, marriage, and self. "
— Saroum, 1/4/2011" The only two books I read about marriage before getting married were this one - recommended by my friend's friend - and Shalom in the Home by Shmuley Boteach. I think they were just enough. Smith is very direct and I appreciated that. I will buy it as an engagement gift someday I'm sure. "
— Samantha, 10/19/2010" good for anyone, in any stage of their love (single, married, engaged) who is interested in having an authentic relationship. "
— Erin, 9/16/2010" Great book to those thinking about getting married or already married. Talks a lot about being completely honest about who you are to your significant other. "
— Katie, 7/6/2010" I'm definitely not a self-help book reader. This book was given to me by a friend when I got engaged in 2005. I didn't read it until now (2009). I was nodding the whole time I read it. It has some good, common sense relationship advice. "
— Kim, 10/23/2009" I really am enjoying this book. Brings a lot of insite into all types of relationships and just as the title implies, there are a lot of lies told at the altar. I feel confident as a newly wed, but have found good advice and things to think about. "
— Amanda, 10/4/2009" Great insights on things to look out for prior to marriage, but also ways to be realistic and insightful throughout a long relationship. "
— Katelin, 9/30/2009" I don't drink the Oprah kool-aid, but I found this book to be very practical and useful. It had unique ideas and concepts that I hadn't thought about before. I also like the phrase "show up as a grown up." "
— Ginger, 8/7/2009" Omg, this is the best book I've ever read about marriage!! It's funny how we are brought up thinking some things about marriage and men, to only find out after various failed relationships or marriages, that we don't really have to take all the bull crap!! "
— Jeanette, 8/4/2009" Nothing spectacular, but a good view on marriage. "
— Alicia, 5/13/2009" This author "tells it like it is." I liked her examples and ideas. The questions are helpful for those who are considering marriage or those who are married and wish to discuss them. "
— Angela, 1/7/2009Robin L. Smith, MD is a global thought leader in the regenerative medicine industry, one of the fastest growing segments of modern-day medicine. She received her MD from Yale University and an MBA from the Wharton School of Business. During her tenure as CEO of the NeoStem family of companies (NASDAQ: NBS).