Brilliant, unconventional college senior Trace Pennington has eked out an impoverished, solitary, but highly functional existence in the years since she ran away from her abusive home. But when Trace finds love with a much older man, her life is upended and she is forced to face herself and her past. After recovering a horrific, long-suppressed memory, she discovers that much of her present-day life is a carefully constructed delusion. With equal parts genius and psychosis, Trace copes with the fallout from a brutal, bizarre childhood in a heart-stopping story that explores both the terror and wonder of mental illness.
Download and start listening now!
"really wish i could give this a 4.5. the best way to describe this book is if it was a movie, david lynch would be the director. i still don't know what was real and what wasn't, but it was one of the more thought-provoking books i've read in a long long time. "
— Kristina (5 out of 5 stars)
“Kimmel offers a beautifully wrought portrait of the brilliant and psychotic Trace Pennington…Kimmel skillfully weaves together Trace’s lucid moments and her diminishing sanity, providing a full picture of a troubled woman whose identity, past, and present are repeatedly called into question.”
— Publishers Weekly (starred review)“Disturbing and haunting, Kimmel’s latest novel builds slowly and ominously, ratcheting up the suspense right up to the final page and captivating the reader with Trace’s frightening downward spiral.”
— Booklist“[Kimmel] has crafted a dark and complex tale of dual personalities…The novel remains grounded in its striking prose, its unique portrayal of mental illness, and, most important, its captivating main character, Trace Pennington.”
— Bookmarks magazine“Haven Kimmel not only writes like an angel, she has a gorgeous warm voice and skills any actor would envy. I can’t imagine a better narrator to present Trace’s searching, terrible confusion, her incantatory understanding of the world, and the utterly harrowing truth about her past. Stunning work in every way.”
— AudioFile" I really love Haven Kimmel's work. Her two memoirs about growing up in small town Indiana are fantastic. Her novels are all intriguing and written by a clearly intellectual writer. My one complaint is that I don't always get them. That was especially true of this story, which portrayed the mental breakdown of its protagonist through a number of mythological archetypes that I am unfamiliar with. Normally I'd get irritated: "why should the reader have to do all this bloody work?!", but I also get the sense that Kimmel knows what she's doing, and if she wants to write a book that only those who have taken religion/psychology/mythology classes will get 100%, more power to her. "
— Alex, 2/19/2014" Very disturbing book. I am sure there are many who have experienced this as reality living....so sad to think even one person has. "
— Shirley, 2/18/2014" I read about 1/4 of this book before I gave up. It was all a bit much for me, read more like a psychology text then a novel. Maybe I'll pick it up again at some point in the future when I'm in the necessary frame of mind. "
— Aubrie, 1/26/2014" This book is amazing (and I'm not just saying it because Haven's my friend). It's deep and profound at so many levels. I love the story, the writing, and the exploration of great themes. I highly recommend it. "
— Brent, 12/28/2013" If I could give it 0 stars I would "
— Diana, 12/18/2013" blah, abandoned "
— Betsy, 11/29/2013" Interesting concept, hard to follow and often had no idea what was real and what was not. "
— Chasity, 11/6/2013" I can say I finished it, but I can't say I liked it. I kept going because the author is usually a favorite. "
— Denise, 10/31/2013" Yeah, I skimmed through the last 50 pages, I'll admit it. It lost my interest. "
— Amanda, 6/20/2013" Really enjoyed it, and although it probably shouldn't have been, it had a surprise ending for me. Great writing by the author of A Girl Named Zippy although I'm going to guess it's a tad on the dark side for a lot of people. "
— Karen, 3/17/2013" This book is not for people easily confused....i was suprised at how wel i kept with the story line, except at the end......... "
— Stevie, 2/19/2013" HOLY BOLOGNA! "
— cassie, 12/30/2012" Didn't finish. Couldn't get into it, though the writing was lovely, story -- notsomuch. Kinda creepy in an ewwww way. At least so far as I got in picking up hints and innuendo... "
— Amanda, 10/24/2012" I really liked this book, but do not feel in any way qualified to write an informed review. I have much thinking to do before that would be possible. As the five stars indicate: an amazing read, an astonishing piece of work. "
— Matt, 9/9/2012" This book reads like a fever dream. Who are these people, and why is the protagonist on the run? Very gripping. I stayed up until 1:30 to finish reading it -- on a weeknight! Disturbing and thought-provoking. "
— Renee, 4/24/2012" Very different from Zippy style of writing. I'm not sure I like it. I definately don't like her psychobababble but maybe due to my psych background and being a therapist I'm not fascinated by the crazy enough to spend leisure time reading their stories. Hmmm. "
— Dawna, 9/15/2011" Insufferable, pretentious! Was Haven Kimmel on crack? Stick with her other novels unless you have masochistic tendencies. "
— Patty, 2/11/2011" Extremely cerebral read. Not easy to follow but is somehow darkly engaging. "
— Aly, 1/2/2011" Didn't finish. Couldn't get into it, though the writing was lovely, story -- notsomuch. Kinda creepy in an ewwww way. At least so far as I got in picking up hints and innuendo... "
— Amanda, 10/4/2010" Trace Pennington is an unreliable narrator. She is plagued by mental illness and something horrible in her past that she has blocked out. Is what she telling us true? Is it all a delusion? Delve into the mind of the mentally ill and be prepared for some twists. "
— Olean, 8/18/2010" Insufferable, pretentious! Was Haven Kimmel on crack? Stick with her other novels unless you have masochistic tendencies. "
— Patty, 7/28/2010" It took me longer to read this book than it should, but it was worth it, it was a very intelligent novel. I keep thinking about it. "
— linnea, 7/23/2010" Way over my head. I need to read it again. "
— Jmw, 7/9/2010" A strange and unsettling book. The quality of the writing is excellent (although the copy editing was a bit shoddy), but the book leaves you with the feeling of being in the middle of someone's actual nightmare. "
— Caroline, 6/29/2010" This book reads like a fever dream. Who are these people, and why is the protagonist on the run? Very gripping. I stayed up until 1:30 to finish reading it -- on a weeknight! Disturbing and thought-provoking. "
— Renee, 6/23/2010Haven Kimmel is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of A Girl Named Zippy, She Got Up Off the Couch, and Something Rising (Light and Swift). She studied English and creative writing at Ball State University and North Carolina State University and attended seminary at the Earlham School of Religion. She lives in Durham, North Carolina.