We’ve all heard the statistic: Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. It’s enough to make many couples give up when the going gets rough, thinking that’s what everybody else does. But what if it weren’t true? What if, in fact, it’s not only possible but often easier than you think to save a seemingly troubled relationship? These are the questions leading New York Times blogger Tara Parker-Pope asked herself after her own divorce. An investigative journalist on the health and wellness beat, she turned to some of the top biologists, neuroscientists, psychologists, and other scientists for the facts about marriage and divorce. Those facts were more positive and provocative than she’d ever expected, and For Better offers page after page of astonishing, eye-opening good news. Parker-Pope presents the science behind why some marriages work and others don’t; the biology behind why some spouses cheat and others remain faithful; the best diagnostic tools created by the most cutting-edge psychologists to assess the probability of success in getting married, staying married, or remarrying. There are questionnaires to uncover potentially damaging hidden attitudes toward spouses. There are tools to show the impact of routine, fresh activity and how small adjustments can make a huge difference. Tara Parker-Pope’s genius is for exploring the science behind the big issues that affect our lives every day and translating that science into advice that we can use—every day. For Better is the definitive guide to the most profound relationship of our lives.
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"I enjoyed this book - there is practical, studied advice for improving a relationship, as well as plenty of optimism about the state of marriage in general. I appreciated the scientific approach to understanding marriage. Useful for those about to get hitched (ahem, moi) and especially tailored to those who are married - whether the relationship is strong, good, or needs work."
— Sarah (4 out of 5 stars)
" It was really interesting reading about the statistics/science behind what makes a good marriage. "
— Jenny, 2/4/2014" Very interesting. A lot of it I have read before, but it's great to have it all in one cohesive, easy-to-reference volume. It normalizes a lot of relationship problems and gives scientifically sound advice instead of preaching. I think it's great for anyone in a relationship to read, married or not! "
— Nicole, 1/27/2014" A solid, evidence-based reminder that strong, healthy marriages require work. "
— Libby, 1/11/2014" I learned some interesting things from this book (the first 3 minutes of a fight have the biggest impact on your marriage, splitting the household duties is important to reduce tension- but may reduce passion, arguing does not equal a bad marriage, etc.) However, the fact that Parker-Pope normally writes for magazines is obvious. It reads like a feature magazine article that a student had to stretch out in order to meet a page requirement. There's a lot of summaries and often studies are cited over and over again. I'd recommend skimming. "
— Madison, 1/10/2014" couldn't finish it, the text was pretty dry, I found her science kind of sketchy and it was just to heterosexually oriented for me to really get good information from the book. "
— Suz, 12/30/2013" Excellent! Many insights into what makes a marriage work. "
— Hom, 12/28/2013" Parker-Pope may not do a great job of sorting the serious studies from the fluff, but provides some interesting views on what makes a marriage work (or not). "
— Sam, 12/20/2013" nothing earth-shattering. but still interesting in that she searched for social science literature, as opposed to pop psychological theories, to better understand marriage & divorce. "
— Terra, 12/17/2013" Awesome book about marriage and what makes it work well. The entire book is filled with quantitative psych research about marriage and even just relationships in general. This book is filled with action items and insights to make your relationships work. Great book. "
— Mduncan86, 10/27/2013" Great. If you're in a committed partnership or seriously considering one, I'd recommend at least skimming it. "
— Berkeley, 10/15/2013" Quite interesting--lots of good information if you're pre-marriage, as a gut check, and lots of ideas that can be used in any relationship to make it even stronger. I enjoyed it, and although I didn't think there was much new, to have it all in one place was really useful. "
— Chris, 10/3/2013" The book was an interesting read and had some quizzes you could test your marriage against. But overall, I had some trouble with believing her statistics were any more valid than the ones she was refuting. I think it was worth reading, but with a critical eye. "
— Heidi, 12/21/2012" The first third of this book was five-star fascinating but fizzled out into a self-help book quickly thereafter. "
— Megan, 12/1/2012" Really enjoyed this. At times a bit repetitive, but I learned a lot and have since thought about how I can be a better wife to my husband. "
— Katie, 11/12/2012" I listened to this on audible but I think it would have been very beneficial to actually read the book. Intersting facts and figures about marriage, divorce etc. She tries to tie a successful marriage into a scientific/mathematical formula...not sure if I agree but very neat book :) "
— Julie, 4/16/2012" Really good book - lots of excellent advice on marriage. Wish they'd given some more specific, practical examples - was a bit more general, but still really good. "
— Jess, 11/21/2011" An easy to read wrap up if a lot of research I've seen in other places on marriage. Not as compelling as Gottman's book, but still informative. A bit repetitive toward the end. "
— Leslie, 11/9/2011" Many parts of this book were very interesting (particularly the section on marriage statistics), but other parts felt overly heavy-handed. I'm glad I read it, but I'm not certain I would recommend it to anyone else. "
— Kristin, 5/1/2011" interesting. would have rather read an article length version. "
— Laura, 3/10/2011" A solid, evidence-based reminder that strong, healthy marriages require work. "
— Libbyholden, 3/6/2011" Science and social science applied to marriage. Even when I disagreed with the author's conclusions, I felt that the studies were clearly presented and thought-provoking. A good book to read and talk about. "
— Jennifer, 2/9/2011" A little bland, but chock full of tips based on the latest research--it's amazing how our health, finances and well-being are so tied up in the strength and durability of our closest relationships. "
— Laura, 2/6/2011" Excellent! Many insights into what makes a marriage work. "
— Hom, 2/4/2011" An easy to read wrap up if a lot of research I've seen in other places on marriage. Not as compelling as Gottman's book, but still informative. A bit repetitive toward the end. "
— Leslie, 2/3/2011" this totally spoke to my inner science geek. "
— Mirjam, 12/13/2010" Really helpful easy to understand information about relationships and gender differences. Marriage sounds like a much more hopeful prospect than I had previously thought. Also recommended Why Men Never Remember and Women Never Forget. "
— Andrea, 10/21/2010" Interesting synthesis. A little quiz-heavy. The low divorce statistics were eye opening. "
— Rob, 10/19/2010" I learned a few interesting things from this book, but on the whole was not overly impressed. Felt a little negative to me at times, despite being called "For Better..." Not one I would run out to recommend. "
— Saralyn, 10/17/2010" I listened to this on audible but I think it would have been very beneficial to actually read the book. Intersting facts and figures about marriage, divorce etc. She tries to tie a successful marriage into a scientific/mathematical formula...not sure if I agree but very neat book :) "
— Julie, 10/3/2010Tara Parker-Pope, who writes the “Well” blog for the New York Times, is one of the newspaper’s most popular and most e-mailed journalists. She appears regularly on radio and television, including Today, Good Morning America, and CNN. Parker-Pope lives in Bucks County, Pennsylvania.
Cassandra Campbell has won multiple Audie Awards, Earphones Awards, and the prestigious Odyssey Award for narration. She was been named a “Best Voice” by AudioFile magazine and in 2018 was inducted in Audible’s inaugural Narrator Hall of Fame.