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Download Confessions of a Scary Mommy: An Honest and Irreverent Look at Motherhood - The Good, The Bad, and the Scary Audiobook

Extended Audio Sample Confessions of a Scary Mommy: An Honest and Irreverent Look at Motherhood - The Good, The Bad, and the Scary Audiobook, by Jill Smokler Click for printable size audiobook cover
3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 3.00 (1,141 ratings) (rate this audio book) Author: Jill Smokler Narrator: Jill Smokler Publisher: Brilliance Audio Format: Unabridged Audiobook Delivery: Instant Download Audio Length: Release Date: August 2012 ISBN: 9781469219042
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Sometimes I just let my children fall asleep in front of the TV.

In a culture that idealizes motherhood, it’s scary to confess that, in your house, being a mother is beautiful and dirty and joyful and frustrating all at once. Admitting that it’s not easy doesn’t make you a bad mom; at least, it shouldn’t.

If I can’t survive my daughter as a toddler, how the hell am I going to get through the teenage years?

When Jill Smokler was first home with her small children, she thought her blog would be something to keep friends and family updated. To her surprise, she hit a chord in the hearts of mothers everywhere.

I end up doing my son’s homework. It’s wrong, but so much easier.

Total strangers were contributing their views on that strange reality called motherhood. As other women shared their stories, Jill realized she wasn’t alone in her feelings of exhaustion and imperfection.

My eighteen month old still can’t say “Mommy” but used the word “shit” in perfect context.

But she sensed her readers were still holding back, so decided to start an anonymous confessional, a place where real moms could leave their most honest thoughts without fearing condemnation.

I pretend to be happy but I cry every night in the shower.

The reactions were amazing: some sad, some pee-in-your-pants funny, some brutally honest. But they were real, not a commercial glamorization.

I clock out of motherhood at 8 P.M. and hide in the basement with my laptop and a beer.

If you’re already a fan, lock the bathroom door on your whining kids, run a bubble bath, and settle in. If you’ve not encountered Scary Mommy before, break out a glass of champagne as well, because you’ll be toasting your initiation into a select club.

I know why some animals eat their young.

In chapters that cover husbands (The Biggest Baby of Them All) to homework (Didn’t I Already Graduate?), Confessions of a Scary Mommy combines all-new essays from Jill with the best of the anonymous confessions.

Sometimes I wish my son was still little — then I hear kids screaming at the store.

As Jill says, “We like to paint motherhood as picture perfect. A newborn peacefully resting on his mother’s chest. A toddler taking tentative first steps into his mother’s loving arms. A mother fluffing her daughter’s prom dress. These moments are indeed miraculous and joyful; they can also be few and far between.”

Download and start listening now!

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Listener Opinions

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Tina | 2/18/2014

    " Awesome! Buying it for all my friends, kids or not! "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Michelle Henson | 2/13/2014

    " One of the funniest books I have read in awhile! I think I could have written this book, most of it sounds like my life, just add a couple more kids! Ha ha!!! If you get some time to read this (it's a short book and easy read) I highly recommend it! Thanks to the author for the laughs and knowing I'm not the only kind of mother like this out there!!! "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Deb | 2/6/2014

    " Really fun and lots of truth!! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Tricia | 2/5/2014

    " absolutely hilarious! recommended for anyone who has kids, wants kids, or needs a reason not to want kids! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Hayley | 1/22/2014

    " Laugh out loud funny, honest, and affirming! "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Libriar | 1/9/2014

    " Terribly boring and really not that funny. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Emily Seaman | 1/7/2014

    " Just what I needed to read right now. Funny, relatable, and made me feel like I'm a part of a new club. :) "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Heather | 1/6/2014

    " Preach it, Jill! It's so nice to know I'm not the only mommy who a)feels like I fail sometimes, b) have confessions to make and c) still wouldn't trade it for anything. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Lyndsee Wunn | 1/5/2014

    " Freaking hilarious!! She puts on paper what so many mom's are thinking in their heads!! "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Jenny Lowe | 12/16/2013

    " i knew i wasn't the only scarey mommy. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Mieke Mcbride | 12/15/2013

    " Read this because I thought the blog was amusing. No other reason. That said, can't say I enjoyed this. The tone is scattered, the book isn't funny. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Robin Benowitz | 12/2/2013

    " I read this book during my flight to New York. It was so funny that I was giggling out loud to the point of people staring. Brings true meaning to LOL. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Melissa | 12/1/2013

    " Parts of this were quite hilarious. Reading the section about sick husbands while my own is sick was comforting! This is a good book to make you feel better about your shortcomings but in other regards it is rather crass - some scary TMI but that was certainly the intention. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Pamela | 11/13/2013

    " I was expecting this book to be more fun. It's interesting cause of all the unique experiences from all sorts of moms. Some of the stories are indeed a little scary. It's a lot of complaining. Can't really relate to it. This book is pretty short. Read it in 2 days while taking care of a 5 month old. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Rebecca | 10/24/2013

    " Hilarious! And so me... I'm gonna be scary. Fun to listen to in the car on the way to and from work. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Laureen Cutrona | 9/20/2013

    " so funny! i found myself laughing out loud and feeling the same way with some things! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Robin | 9/5/2013

    " Extremely lightweight read, but entertaining. SO many situations with which I can relate. I could have written this book 15 years ago. Wish I had... "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Allyson | 8/3/2013

    " Glad that there is finally a mom book that tells it how it really is and that it is okay to feel this way. I will be buying this book for all my friends when they become moms! "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 LeeAnna | 7/4/2013

    " An amusing book and a realistic look at what being a parent is really about. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Alyssa | 6/2/2013

    " Quick fun read where other moms share their dirty little secrets on parenting. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Jules | 5/11/2013

    " great book, love her blog too. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Traci | 4/26/2013

    " Jill Smokler tells it how she sees it. Some of the confessions were funny, some were in awe, and some were heartbreakingly sad. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Allison | 3/21/2013

    " A very quick & entertaining read! "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Christina | 1/28/2013

    " I couldn't get past the introduction. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Janis | 12/8/2012

    " This book is entertaining if you have little kids. If you have teenagers - don't waste the $. I'd kil to have the lil kid issues again. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Kristen | 10/20/2012

    " This was funny! Also a little sad. It definitely made me want to be nicer to parents though, not that I didn't already have infinite respect for them. Also I seriously don't think I could ever be a babysitter. I'm just not a kid-person. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Paula | 8/13/2012

    " Just what I needed in a mom book. My only complaint was that it was too short! Will have to check out her blog. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Christine Lussier | 7/29/2012

    " LOL funny! Any mom with kids can find something (or many things) you can relate to! "

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