With or Without You is a poignant, moving and uplifting tale from the best-selling author, Drew Davies.
Wendy’s life can be neatly divided into two: before and after.
Before her husband’s car accident, it was just the two of them. They never took the train at rush hour, and they avoided their noisy neighbour upstairs. Naveem devoted his spare time to vintage train models, and Wendy to re-reading the well-thumbed pages of her favourite books. It didn’t matter what others thought about their small, quiet life together - they were happy.
After the coma, Wendy barely recognises herself. When she’s not holding the love of her life’s hand, accompanied by the beep of the life-support machine, who is she? The nurse tells her to talk to Naveem - that he can still hear her - but she doesn’t have a single thing to say.
Knowing that every breath her husband takes might be his last, Wendy has no choice but to try to carry on without him. Should she feel guilty about living while his life is on pause? And when - if - he wakes up, will he still love the woman she has become?
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"This book was a difficult read. Mostly, I think, because I was envious. I, like many obsessed readers, really want to be a writer. Ruta was brutally honest in this memoir, especially when it was hateful and ugly. We all have stories, but most of us, certainly me, lack the courage to tell the real, honest to God one, and Ruta clearly doesn't. Plates of drugs, piles of trash, throw-a-way loves - all this laid at the feet of a rotten mother. Maybe she (Ruta) will have coffee with me one day and tell me how to do it!"
— Karen (4 out of 5 stars)
“‘Make it new,’ Ezra Pound directed, and Domenica Ruta has…With or Without You is that rare thing, a story you think you know transformed into one you have to read to the end.”
— Kathryn Harrison, New York Times bestselling author“Freakishly brilliant, brilliantly freakish, this is one of the best memoirs I have ever read. Domenica Ruta has done something every artist with a failed family must do: She has created herself.”
— Gary Shteyngart, New York Times bestselling author“In the world of memoir, Mary Karr’s and Geoffrey Wolff’s exceptional books burn and brighten, like actual stars among strings of tinsel. With or Without You is like that. I will read whatever Domenica Ruta writes.”
— Amy Bloom, New York Times bestselling author“Too often the memoir category sacrifices good writing to the quick pulse of the storyline, but Domenica Ruta is a real and excellent writer who has language by the throat. She writes with big beauty, deep respect for language, and drives her story with huge humanism, empathy, and humor.”
— Gabrielle Hamilton, New York Times bestselling author“Stunning…Comes across as a bleaker, funnier, R-rated version of The Glass Castle.”
— Entertainment Weekly“Gloriously gutsy memory-work.”
— Elle“This book is a luminous, layered accomplishment.”
— New York Times Book Review“Powerful…wicked funny…Ruta writes with unflinching honesty.”
— Slate“Valiant and heartbreaking.”
— Bust“A rare, unfeigned mother-daughter story.”
— Barnes&Noble.com, editorial review“The intensity of the clear-eyed manner in which Ruta conveys her abiding frustration with the parents who failed their child so casually and monumentally is exceedingly powerful stuff.”
— Booklist“A sharp portrayal of recovery from a lifetime of pitfalls and the love that held it all together.”
— Kirkus Reviews" I don't think I can accurately describe why this memoir impacted me so much more strongly than, say, The Glass Castle. I think it may have something to do with the way Jeanette Walls simply turned around and walked away from everything and came out more or less unscathed, whereas Domenica Ruta had to fight her way out of her past and heritage, kicking and screaming. I felt Ruta's struggle far more keenly than I did Walls'. "
— Amantha, 1/31/2014" The story is somewhat dark, but reminded me of my relationship with my mother. I could relate so much that I may have enjoyed it more than others. However, her writing style is wonderful. She has a way of writing that can range from sweet melodic poetry to slam sarcastic poetry. Really enjoyed. "
— Erica, 1/27/2014" Ruta is compared favorably to Mary Karr. I don't think she is nearly as good as Karr. "
— C, 1/25/2014" I just won this book. And now I finished it and really enjoyed it. I have read other memoirs such as Glass Castle and Half Broke Horses, and enjoyed them also. But this book isn't like the others with physical abuse, it is a modern day book written by a girl in her early thirties telling you her story of her addicted mother, her funny Italian grandmother and her father. Great book. Could not put it down. "
— Barb, 1/19/2014" Really deserves 3 1/2 stars. "
— Shari, 1/9/2014" What a powerful, scary, and funny memoir! "
— Mary, 1/4/2014" I have a weakness for bad childhood/recovering alcoholic/addict memoirs. This was a good one. "
— Kim, 12/21/2013" Well written & honest, without being too heavy. In some ways it reminded me of the Glass Castle. Powerful and inspiring to read Ms. Ruta's story. "
— Kate, 12/10/2013" I really enjoyed it. It is a memoir of a child raised by a drug addicted mother. It could have been maudlin and emotional. Instead, the author finds joy and humor in a life too many would label as sad. "
— Susie, 11/14/2013" As funny as it is dark, this examination of Ruta's intense relationship with her mother is superbly written, intimately detailed, and surprisingly compassionate in all the right places. A fantastic debut. "
— Kevin, 7/31/2013" The book started off a little slow but I really enjoyed it! "
— Lisa, 7/14/2013" Made me laugh out loud, even in the darkest moments. "
— Brendan, 5/4/2013" Super painful in a great, cathartic way. Liked this more than I thought I would. Very grateful a friend recommended this. "
— ML, 4/19/2013" Wonderful book! I hope to read more by Nicky soon! "
— Teresa, 2/21/2013" 2 1/2 Stars. Was not bad. I had just read another memoir with a dysfunctional mother. I did like the way she owned up to her own mistakes: it wasn't all about the dysfunctional mother. May have been better if she were older and had had a successful marriage and children. "
— Cassie, 1/24/2013Domenica Ruta was born and raised in Danvers, Massachusetts. She is a graduate of Oberlin College and holds an MFA from the Michener Center for Writers at the University of Texas at Austin. She was a finalist for the Keene Prize for Literature and has been awarded residencies at Yaddo, the MacDowell Colony, the Blue Mountain Center, Jentel, and Hedgebrook.