From actress Portia de Rossi, a revelatory and searing account of the years she spent secretly suffering from anorexia and bulimia, all while living under the glare of Hollywood’s bright lights.
“I didn’t decide to become anorexic. It snuck up on me disguised as a healthy diet, a professional attitude. No more wondering whether I could fit into a sample size dress, or if the camera would catch a bad angle. I just wanted to excel in dieting. And weighing in at 80 pounds on 300 calories a day, I was the best little dieter there ever was.” In this groundbreaking memoir, Portia de Rossi reveals the pain and illness that haunted her for decades, from the time she was a twelve-year-old girl working as a print and runway model in Australia, through her early rise to fame as a cast member of the hit television shows Ally McBeal and Arrested Development . All the while terrified that the truth of her sexuality would be exposed in the tabloids, Portia alternately starved herself and binged, putting her life in danger and concealing from herself and everyone around her the seriousness of her illness.
She describes the elaborate rituals around food that came to dominate hours of every day and explores the pivotal moments of her childhood that set her on the road to illness. She reveals the heartache and fear that accompany a life lived in the closet, a sense of isolation that was only magnified by her unrelenting desire to be ever thinner, ever more in control of her body and the number of calories she consumed and spent.
From her lowest point, Portia began the painful climb back to a life of health and honesty, falling in love and marrying Ellen DeGeneres and emerging as an outspoken, articulate advocate for gay rights and women’s health issues. In this remarkable and landmark work, she is giving the world a story that inspires hope and nourishes the spirit. Download and start listening now!