A Dirty Guide to a Clean Home: Housekeeping Hacks You Can't Live Without Audiobook

Everything you need to know about laundry, cleaning, and basic home repairs—from the TikTok star who made bluing a thing, showed you how to fold a fitted sheet, and taught you to properly use your (caulk) gun.



“[Melissa Pateras] makes chores enjoyable in her bawdy debut. . . . Doing laundry has never sounded so fun.”—Publishers Weekly

Melissa Dilkes Pateras is the most competent housekeeper, DIY-project master, and home repair genius that you’ve ever fantasized about becoming. When she followed her kids on to TikTok, she discovered a community hungry for her approachable, tongue-in-cheek advice on everything from balls—dryer balls, that is—to why color-coded closets are a spiritual experience. She doesn’t expect you to know what you were never taught, and she doesn’t care about transforming your home into a minimal, beige Instagram post; she simply wants to help make your life easier.

Can housekeeping be fun? Whether you’re terrified of your laundry pile or have an inner handyperson who’s been longing for their moment, A Dirty Guide to a Clean Home is a joyful all-purpose guide to organizing, cleaning, laundry, repairs, and beyond. As Melissa says, “Your home shouldn’t be your adversary.”

* This audiobook edition includes a downloadable PDF with helpful instructions, lists, and charts from the book

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"Pateras, who dispenses housekeeping tips on TikTok, makes chores enjoyable in her bawdy debut. . . . The plentiful tips are often surprising. . . . Other ‘hacks’ are simple yet clever. . . . Throughout, Pateras’s ribald humor animates the advice (‘I love balls . . . in my dryer,’ she writes on preferring dryer balls to dryer sheets). Doing laundry has never sounded so fun."

— Publishers Weekly