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Extended Audio Sample Damned Audiobook, by Chuck Palahniuk Click for printable size audiobook cover
3.19 out of 53.19 out of 53.19 out of 53.19 out of 53.19 out of 5 3.19 (36 ratings) (rate this audio book) Author: Chuck Palahniuk Narrator: Tai Sammons Publisher: Blackstone Audio Format: Unabridged Audiobook Delivery: Instant Download Audio Length: Release Date: October 2011 ISBN: 9781470802479
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“Are you there, Satan? It’s me, Madison,” declares the whip-tongued thirteen-year-old narrator of Damned, Chuck Palahniuk’s subversive new work of fiction. The daughter of a narcissistic film star and a billionaire, Madison is abandoned at her Swiss boarding school over Christmas, while her parents are off touting their new projects and adopting more orphans. She dies over the holiday of a marijuana overdose—and the next thing she knows, she’s in Hell. Madison shares her cell with a motley crew of young sinners that is almost too good to be true: a cheerleader, a jock, a nerd, and a punk rocker, united by fate to form the six-feet-under version of everyone’s favorite detention movie. Madison and her pals trek across the Dandruff Desert and climb the treacherous Mountain of Toenail Clippings to confront Satan in his citadel. All the popcorn balls and wax lips that serve as the currency of Hell won’t buy them off.

This is the afterlife as only Chuck Palahniuk could imagine it: a twisted inferno where The English Patient plays on endless repeat, roaming demons devour sinners limb by limb, and the damned interrupt your dinner from their sweltering call center to hard-sell you Hell. He makes eternal torment, well, simply divine.

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Quotes & Awards

  • “Palahniuk’s twelfth novel is just as gleefully, vividly, hilariously obscene as you’d expect—and it’s also a hell of a lot of fun…As a young adult novel, it’s surprisingly sweet, hopeful, and empowering; as a satire, it’s funny, irreverent, and hugely entertaining.”

    NPR

  • “Narrator Tai Sammons delivers a stellar reading in which she captures the essence of Madison. Her dialect, delivery, and tone are perfectly suited to that of a thirteen-year-old who’s having a really, really bad day. Listening to Sammons’ narration is an intimate experience as her rendition of Madison pours her heart out and prays her words won’t fall only on dead ears.”

    Publishers Weekly (starred review)

  • “The story scoots along like any great adventure story, as she takes on Hitler and Catherine de Medici, and it’s a delight seeing Madison find her place in life, even if it’s in death.”

    Booklist

  • A New York Times Bestseller
  • Selected for the November 2011 Indie Next List

Listener Opinions

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Amanda | 2/10/2014

    " Mmmm...just not my kind of book. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Chemical_disaster13 000000 | 2/10/2014

    " I dont really know what to think of this book. Yes, it was amusing. (I SO want to say a small spoiler!!) But, it was also a tad dumb...I didnt even understand the plot in the book till about half way through, until then I was thouroughly confused. I never understood why he made that main chick (forgot her name, I read too many books....is that possible??) keep saying that we living people think that we are better than the dead. I truely never thought about it. Ever. But, now that I did, I realized, that, I dont care. ha. She also said that mexicans and gays even think they are better. WHAT!!?? Is this guy some racist homophobic?? Is the main chicks name madison? Yes, Madison Spencer. Anyway, so, she seemed a bit off the whole time, always like she NEVER really cared about anything, and the afterlife in this book, outragious, but, cool. :) I didnt like how (Goran) went there and everything was just okay. WEIRDOS. I woulda fought man. :) This book is worth reading, it truely is, but you just need to overlook the annoying parts. :) "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Lillian | 2/9/2014

    " Sorry but this book was just bad. It sucks that this was the first book I ever read by Chuck. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Joshua James | 2/5/2014

    " I used to love Chuck Palahniuk, but I was younger then and I think less cranky. I've gone back and reread Fight Club recently, previously my favourite, and discovered that everything I thought I loved from that book was actually from the movie adaptation. He hasn't written anything interesting in years, starting with Diary and peaking with Rant (however I immensely enjoyed Haunted, and to a lesser extent, Pygmy). I didnt even bother with Tell-All. Usually my gripe with him is that he takes a great nihilistic, blackly satyrical concept and cops out at the end. I had thought that the only way to end a book worse than "it was only a dream!" was to end it with happy characters that discover hope and values in the same society that's he's spent the entire novel poking fun at. As it turns out, there IS a worse way to end it: by NOT ending it. Ok, fine, so he's decided to spend at least one more book with this character. For me, by the end of Damned, it felt more like he's strung together a bunch of crazy, sometimes moderately funny what-if's about hell and then in a panic, realizing he hadn't a clue as to how to end it, just wrote "To be continued" instead. That, and the disappointment that came with realizing I hadn't laughed out loud once or retained a single quotable line (and in the past, I found his novels rich with both), leaves me wondering: "Are you there, Chuck? It's me, your fan." I'm giving this three stars only because I hated a few of his other books more, and because none of his books are worse than, say, Twilight. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Meagan | 1/24/2014

    " Damned is full of satire "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Rob | 1/14/2014

    " A "to be continued" ending? Really? "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Christian Babin | 1/13/2014

    " Chuck's latest book follows a young girl who just arrived in Hell and slowly begins a journey to make a name for herself in eternal damnation. Apparently, there are two sequels for this coming out, and with good reason. While the book was great, it left me wanting more. The ending felt like the ending to a film, just teasing you to wait for the sequel. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Michael Johnston | 1/3/2014

    " along with snuff this is chucks second best. mesmerising. hell has never been so vastly explained. the vulgarity of the underworld is overwhemingly sickening. i shudder with excitement at this novel. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 David | 12/11/2013

    " Hell is for those who can't forgive themselves. I value this book for trying to explain this. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Jay Kulpa | 12/5/2013

    " Downright annoying and repetitive. By the fourth "and even though I'm 13, yes I know what X word is" and "putdown mcputdownerson" you're ready to hurl this "damned" thing across the room. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Megumi Terui | 11/13/2013

    " Not what I expected, and turned out to be not my kind of book: too scatological for me. I won't even bother finishing it. "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Cassie Massaker | 11/6/2013

    " I was disappointed in this book. I loved many of Chucks books. This was a little too juvenile on the descriptions of Hell, and I understand it was in the POV of a teenaged girl, but it was somewhat over the top. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 outis | 10/28/2013

    " pretty much hated this book. tries to be a 13-year old breakfast club in hell very unsuccessfully. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Lisa | 10/22/2013

    " Not Fight Club or Haunted caliber, but as always Chuck's wicked wit shines through. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Rebekah Simmons bruette | 8/30/2013

    " This book is AWESOME!! funny, interesting, twisted, thought provoking.. and CHUCK! I Totally reccomend you read it now. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Sarah Yeager | 8/20/2013

    " Not as deep or dark as his other books but I'm thrilled with the to be continued ending, as I was not expecting it. I give Damned 5 stars because if it isn't and psychologically trying as his other books, Maddie is my personal favorite character. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Sara | 3/26/2013

    " Better than his last few (which I thought were dreadful) but not as good as his earlier stuff. Meh... "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Colleen | 2/25/2013

    " Interesting for Chuck to write such a young protag. Like the world he's created here. Looking forward to the next installment. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Ken | 12/23/2012

    " 13-year-old girl writing from Hell. Interesting. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Jenny Cupcakes | 11/18/2012

    " I found myself relating a lot to Maddy but halfway through the book, it just got stupid. Oh well, such is the case with many of Palahniuk's later work. What the f*ck, Chuck? "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Jake | 7/11/2012

    " The most truly hellacious tenet of this novel is his repetition of certain token phrases, quirks, and character idiosyncrasies. That said, the last fifty pages or so redeemed it from an eternity of fire and brimstone. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Ryan | 6/26/2012

    " Loved the premise, especially this idea of a 'Breakfast Club in Hell,' but the book began to drag for me. Chuck always manages to throw in a twisty ending, but this one was downright ludicrous. It's got plenty of the standard Chuck P charm, but I'd suggest most fans stay away. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Bobby | 6/11/2012

    " Another Palahniuk novel. Outrageous premise? Check. Pop culture references? Check. Catch phrases? Check. Gratuitous obsceneties? Check. Formulaic? Check. Chuck on autopilot. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Ian | 5/11/2012

    " A slick, entertaining read that might best be described as "The Breakfast Club goes to Hell". The satire at times tends to be a bit obvious, and it doesn't quite have the resonance of some of Palahniuk's other novels, but it's entertaining nonetheless. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Kate | 12/6/2011

    " No Fight Club, but entertaining enough. "

  • 1 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 51 out of 5 Teresa | 11/20/2011

    " First Chuck book I've truly hated. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Barry | 11/8/2011

    " I really liked it at first. Then I got worried, because I thought it was just leveling out into a series of of underworld plus on words. But that is apparently what he wanted to have happen, because just as my hope had disappeared, salvation was at hand. It's clever and funny and really original. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Kdmae1 | 11/7/2011

    " I never really know what to expect when it comes to Chucks work but I love his writing style. I enjoyed this book I like the twisted, dark humor. I really hope theres a second book like the last page suggest! "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Melinda | 11/6/2011

    " Only C.P. could give a description of both hell and adolescence that will make the reader double over in gut-busting laughter! Madeline Spencer is my hero! Can't wait for the sequel. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Amy | 11/2/2011

    " On of my new favorite books from one of my favorite writers. Loved it. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 John | 11/2/2011

    " I really enjoyed listening to this book. It kept my interest the entire time. I am looking forward to the sequel. "

  • 4 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 54 out of 5 Cheri | 11/1/2011

    " I enjoyed the social commentary quite a lot.

    The new take on the cliche ending I was expecting and totally hate was interesting but a little too megalomaniacal. So yay for not-metafiction but I feel it was a betrayal of the novel's power. "

  • 5 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 55 out of 5 Michael | 11/1/2011

    " I just picked up this book tonight and I'm so excited to read it! Having read every other book by Chuck Palahniuk (and loved them all in their own ways) I know I'm going to enjoy this one! "

  • 2 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 52 out of 5 Minxyminou | 11/1/2011

    " I used to be a huge fan of Chuck Palahniuk but this book, like most of his recent works is formulaic and banal. The piled on oh so Palahniuk stylistic elements just don't make up for the lack of story here. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Jamison | 10/31/2011

    " Good book, but not my favorite Palahniuk -- it was too arbitrarily absurd for me. Very short too, even for Chuck. "

  • 3 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 53 out of 5 Kate | 10/31/2011

    " A mix of "Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret," "The Breakfast Club" and a tween novel all rolled into one. It was a fun read. Not great, not terrible either. "

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About the Author
Author Chuck Palahniuk

Chuck Palahniuk’s bestselling novels include Tell-All, Damned, Pygmy, Snuff, Rant, Haunted, Lullaby, Fight Club, Diary, Survivor, Invisible Monsters, and Choke. He is also the author of a nonfiction profile, Fugitives and Refugees: A Walk in Portland, Oregon, published as part of the Crown Journeys series, and the nonfiction collection Stranger Than Fiction. He lives in the Pacific Northwest.

About the Narrator

Tai Sammons earned her degree in theater from Southern Oregon University in Ashland, where she worked at the Oregon Shakespeare Festival. This award-winning actress currently resides upstate in Portland, with her beloved black pug, Oscar.